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do you care if people don't like you?

M

ManDss

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 22, 2018
Messages
1,353
Location
Argentina
I dont. Doesnt give me any bad feeling. I feel pretty ok with myself, so if someone doesnt like me I think they are wrong, because Im very good.
 
MeAndMyDepression

MeAndMyDepression

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Joined
Feb 6, 2021
Messages
1,325
Location
Punta Gorda, Florida, USA
I used to be much more sensitive to certain people not liking me. Now, I'm much more mellow, and I say "f*ck 'em." However, since my divorce in 2017, my two adult children haven't spoken to me, and I am HIGHLY sensitive to them not liking me, if this is the case. This situation is making my already severe depression even worse.
 
P

Pink

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Joined
Sep 23, 2019
Messages
241
Location
London
Yes I get paranoid. Most times I don't care, but when I am anxious, it really bugs me.
 
lucynah

lucynah

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 22, 2021
Messages
57
Location
Earth
Yes and no...

Most of the time I don't really care.
But if I've done something that makes people dislike me, then it affects me very deeply.
 
C

Cardigon

Member
Joined
Feb 17, 2021
Messages
15
Location
AZ
I don’t like it when they dislike me just because I can’t always engage for fear of agreeing to something I don’t really like. This is especially true because of my social anxiety. They then form their own opinions and judge me as one who doesn’t care about something that maybe important. Because then judgement turns to criticism which makes me hide inside even more.
 
Urban Hermit

Urban Hermit

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Joined
Jan 18, 2019
Messages
3,034
Ita hard, but the important thing is too try and think that most people don't think about you nearly as much as you think xxc
 
Lone_wanderer

Lone_wanderer

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Joined
Jan 22, 2012
Messages
5,848
Not particularly no, it mattered to me a lot maybe 35 years when I had low self esteem, most people do like me I'm told. I try to get on with people no matter what. I have a dry sense of humor that cracks people up amongst other traits. Personally I don't care if you don't like me, I'm probably if you know me well one of the loyalist friends you'll ever had, but that's led to me being used a few times.
 
S

Shay94

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
497
Location
Australia WA
I used to be really sensitive and hurt when I'd find out someone doesn't like me, especially when I've done nothing to them. I try to get on with everyone no matter who they are, I'm the sorta person that likes to keep the peace & keep convos light/happy despite me suffering from depression/anxiety. I still be polite etc if people talk to me etc but I no longer care as much if others dislike me, for any reason. I've started to speak my mind bit more now whereas I never used to as I absolutely hate confrontations (still do but I pick my battles & whether if I have energy to deal with it). After having a family member go thru cancer for 2nd time and all of my mates ditched me coz they didn't want to deal with it, I dont really care as much now what people's opinions of me are. I know I'm one of the most loyal friends people have ever had, it has led me to being used by others a few times over the years but I know those that truly care bout me will support me 100% no matter what
 
L

Ladyfair

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Joined
Aug 12, 2020
Messages
2,103
Location
USA
No, if someone doesn't like me they don't. Just recently two so called friends don't talk to me anymore. Why? because I won't be pushed around and they couldn't deal with that. Life goes on.
 
Jolly

Jolly

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Joined
Dec 26, 2020
Messages
1,571
Location
United Kingdom
I used to be much more sensitive to certain people not liking me. Now, I'm much more mellow, and I say "f*ck 'em." However, since my divorce in 2017, my two adult children haven't spoken to me, and I am HIGHLY sensitive to them not liking me, if this is the case. This situation is making my already severe depression even worse.
I am so sad for you about your children. My eldest did the same before she emigrated but we then made up thank goodness. She now keeps by regular texting. When she went my depression was horrendous. I remember sitting in a park after work and it was pitch black just crying and crying. She had been in oz now 11 years so I cannot imagine how you must feel. My heart goes out to you. I have tried not to dwell on the past but it creeps up on me. It must be the hardest feeling to cope with.
 
hicks

hicks

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Joined
May 14, 2019
Messages
2,732
Location
A galaxy, far far away..
Ita hard, but the important thing is too try and think that most people don't think about you nearly as much as you think xxc
True, people are getting on with their own lives, and trying to deal with their problems.
Some of the most toxic situations I've encountered have been at work, but trying to understand why people behave towards me in a certain way, helps explain their actions. And most of the time, it's not a personal dislike that's the issue. Often it's their own selfish reasons and personal agenda.
After all, most of us here are good, reasonable and friendly people. How could anyone have a problem with that?!
 
S

squizofrenia123

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 21, 2020
Messages
221
Location
earth
I care if people don't like me. But, I can't do anything about it. I used to worry about it when I was younger. Now, I worry about myself. I try not to offend anybody. If they still don't like me, may be, it can't be helped.
 
Twinkle Toes

Twinkle Toes

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Mar 11, 2020
Messages
407
Location
somewhere out there
I used to be quite secure in my friendships and relationships until social media revealed a 'friend' was telling me different stories when she visited compared to things she said on her SM page.

When she told everyone else on there first that she and partner were finally get married and I wasn't even included in the tagged people that had been told before she had announced it on there I was really hurt as we had been friends long before SM was invented!

Her partner had once told me she considered me her best friend, for me nothing had changed so it was a complete shock to me to find I had been replaced in some cases by people she hadn't even met in real life!

with me having autism and not understanding what I could have possibly done wrong to deserve it (as my definition of a best friend was someone you'd want to tell important life events to firsst before anyone else) this therefore meant she no longer saw me as her best friend and the alters kicked into disconnect from her so she couldn't hurt me again. I think the fact my dog had also died a few weeks after I found out, who had been my support dog 15 years made me feel I'd lost both my best friends in a short space of time and had no idea how to handle that!

A new host was sent 'up front' who felt no connection to her but had retained the precious memories and love of my old dog.

tbh I'm reluctant to get that 'attached' to another friend cos if you don't know someone after 15-20 yrs when do you know them???? A sibling also getting divorced after their partner cheated on them after roughly the same amount of time confirmed that theory for me in my mind (that someone will pretend to love you or be your friend for long time then change their mind and cut you off)

I've given up on understanding the Neuro-typical mind, trying to 'be normal', fit in or have NT friends. I just haven't had the patience to deal with it since I had hit menopause too!
 
jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
6,101
Location
Canada
I don't really talk to anybody these days, just a bit to my brother, and we get along OK. Not much meaningful conversation but no ill will either. Another brother became estranged but he lives in another province anyway. He was upset with me not talking to him. I would avoid him as I was uncomfortable, with my social phobia. Can't really expect him to understand that as we used to be sort of close, when we drank together anyway, years ago. But more recently I'd get scared of what he might say, like critical unhappy bitter things and he acts superior sometimes, and I just don't have time for all his baggage and need to dominate conversation and the weird stuff he says. But I get he has his own problems and is mostly a decent guy. So I care a little bit about all that.
 
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