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Do Not know what to do next. Son has extreme anxiety and won't go to school

L

loveletter

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2010
Messages
5
Location
Cambridgeshire
Do Not know what to do next. Son has extreme anxiety and won't go to school

I have a 12 year old son his father died May 07. At the same time a local family bullied us and many times tried to break into our home late at night when they where drunk. They once threatened us in the street and often in the middle of the night my son then age 10 and me had to flee out of a back door to safety.
I did call the police each time.
We felt so unsafe we had to not sleep at other peoples houses as we where so scared.
In Aug 08 I got a different house in a nice area away from all this and we are very happy and at peace here.
At this time my son refused to go to school. He has only been to school 14 times in the last year and a half.
He has for a long time been locking doors even in the day time putting bolts and chains on. He is scared if the door knocks even in the day time.
One time some one knocked on the door at 6pm. My son was so scared he got a knife. It was only a mate.
When I got up the next morning my son was on a sofa he had not been to bed all night and had sat with a knife as he thought we may be attacked.
He has months ago stopped going out the house, he as he does not go to school has not made any mates so is at home all the time.
He does not want to have a bath or change cloths.

I asked for help from social services 8 months ago. Since then they have wrote many many reports on me and are saying I am neglecting my son.
They are saying it is my fault as I have acrophobia and severe panic disorder and I have had this for about 20 years.

In Feb this year they put my son on a child protection plan.

Education decided to prosecute me and last week I was in court. I collapsed in the dock as they said about a prison sentence. The thought of going to prison is filling me with total terror as I can not leave my home alone can not even shurt my son bedroom or bathroom door so I think I would go mad in a prison cell.

My son when he was threatening to hang himself if made to go to court was seen by 2 mental helath workers in December 08 for 1 hour.
They said not much wrong with him that getting back to school would not solve.

I have gone to different gps to get my son help but have been told by 2 gps not much wrong with son that getting back to school would not solve.

I myself am seeing a behavouir theripist at the hospial and he asked me to keep a diary on my son he then read this and said it seems your son is suffering from post trumatic stress.

My theripist even come to the child protection case and told the mental health worker this but they just brushed it under the carpet.

I am being told I have to get my son to school as I will be back in court in 4 months time and to prison I will go.

Since the court case I have sleept little and eat little. I am 6 stone, I have got ocd so bad since the court case I am taking 2 hours to get into bed and a hour to get dreesed as I have to keep touching things.

There was a core meeting at social services on Tuesday 23rd March where my gp and myself and son went to.

Itold them I was so menatally unwell and could hardly look after myself and needed to go into a christain retreat and I just ccould not get my son to go to school as he is still refusing so could they let my son stay with foster parants.
Social workers said no. They have sent me home with no help and prison getting closer and closer.
I have told my gp I can not do this no more.
I have sent emails to my local mp today as I can not go on with heaving no help anymore.
As Any one got advice I do not know what to do
 
L

Lady Summer Isles

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 13, 2009
Messages
923
Location
NOBODY KNOWS FOR SURE
I am so sorry you are going through all of this. I do understand as 10 years ago I was in a very similar situation and we had to re-locate with the help of the police. I would say and it's just my opinion that your son does have PTSD. I myself was diagnosed with it. My one daughter missed an awfull lot of school and when we re-located she could not attend much either. She did do her exams but got very poor results. I'm so sorry I really don't know what to suggest other than getting as much written evidence to back up your case as you can. I can't see how they could send you to prison, what good is that going to do for you or your son. You are obviously going through hell. Please feel free to pm me. If I can think of anything else I will pm you too.
Sending Big Hugs
Lady T
:grouphug:
 
L

loveletter

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2010
Messages
5
Location
Cambridgeshire
Thank you for replying I am unsure how to work this website as yet so hope I am doing it right.
Yes every one saying they should not send me to prison but they are talking none stop about this.
When I was in court they made it plan to me that if nothing is changed in 4 months I will go to prison.
I have just emailed my local councillor and have had a reply saying he is contacting social workers asap and has asked for my address and directions to get here so would think he must be thinking of coming to see me.
 
DiagnosisBipolar2

DiagnosisBipolar2

Well-known member
Joined
May 25, 2009
Messages
261
Location
Wiltshire
I'm sorry to hear of all your troubles; what a horrid time you are having:grouphug:

Did you not have someone to represent you in court? If so what advice have you been given?
 
L

Lady Summer Isles

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 13, 2009
Messages
923
Location
NOBODY KNOWS FOR SURE
Will pm you back later:hug:
I have to go out shortly, but it does sound like they may come out and see you.:grouphug:
 
E

Ella2be

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 8, 2011
Messages
573
Location
york
Hello, did you get this sorted?
If not could i suggest home schooling via distance learning? Im currently doing gcse's thru the national extension college.
The courses are expencive but there are groups you can join to get a discount.
Also, i did not have to pay for my courses. I applied to places for grants. I recieved 3 which is brilliant.
I can help you look for places to apply for if you want.

I left school when i was 14/15. I was given the oppertunity to go to a different school, go to a bridge school ( where they send the people who have been excluded) or go to college.
I tried being home tutored too but. It cost too much.
 
S

snakeplissken

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 20, 2009
Messages
168
Location
Scotland
Sounds that both you and your son have been severely traumatised, off the top of my head with no real knowledge I'd advise contacting some Mental Health Charities. At the very least you would get some feedback, MH charities come across a wide variety of issues and may be able through their experience be in a position to give some constructive advice. Even advice on who to turn to for legal assistance or support.
 
A

anonymous1

Guest
I'm sorry to hear that they are being so heavy handed and unhelpful when it does sound like you both have been traumatised through what has happened. I think that home-schooling could be a way forward too - even if its just a temporary solution. There is a children's mental health charity called Young Minds - their helpline telephone number is 0808 802 5544 - not sure what they are like, but could be worth a ring. Also, is it possible to call your CAB from home? I know that some areas in England have telephone advice available from them.

Perhaps also it might be worth contacting somewhere like Mind and seeing if they would be an advocate for you and/or your son.
 
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