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Did my Anxiety/OCD issues prevent me from falling in love?

A

Anxiety432

New member
Joined
Mar 24, 2021
Messages
1
Location
UK
Hi all, I suffer from generalised anxiety and OCD, I've really been trying to get better, but its hard sometimes. Hope I can find some good advice on this forum. So anyway I was in my first ever relationship with a really nice woman who ''ticked all the boxes'', I felt lucky to have her. The first couple of dates with her was exciting, but then once the relationship started to get a bit more serious and I knew she liked me back I lost that ''spark'' and it really bothered me as I felt lucky to have finally met someone so nice. I just didn't feel content for some reason and even had the urge to meet and date others as I wanted to feel that ''excitement'' again despite her being so nice. I really was hoping my feelings would grow over time but they didn't, I stayed with her just under a year until she left me and then shortly after I saw her with a new guy and it made me miss her and feel depressed - but if I wasn't fully into her why did I feel depressed? It wouldn't have been right for me to continue on the relationship if I wasn't content, but i'm wondering if it was my OCD/Anxiety issues that stopped me from feeling it. The times with her were nice, just not ''really really nice''. She did some immature things sometimes during the relationship, I have a fear of heights and she wanted to go on a fair ground ride with me and when I explained that I didn't feel comfortable doing that she walked off in a mood, I caught up with her and she eventually calmed down but still... it wasn't nice. I was feeling discontent before that incident though so that can't have been the reason why my feelings weren't strong enough.

I've been going round in circles mentally torturing myself over trying to figure out why I couldn't feel it for her, if it is because of my OCD/Anxiety issues then that is very frustrating, I feel like I missed out on something special but I can't figure out ''why'' I was not content, I was waiting so long so have a nice girlfriend and I finally did and it still wasn't enough... I worry that I'll be in a similar situation in future relationships but I suppose I can't force myself to have feelings for someone. Any thoughts would be very welcome :)
 
00Bluejay7500 (was Scapes1986)

00Bluejay7500 (was Scapes1986)

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
5,123
Location
My house
Welcome to the forum and sorry you feel depressed over your last girlfriend. Hopefully you can find a new one and forget about your social anxiety

🔹
 
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