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diagnosed BPD recently

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Rina2020

Member
Joined
Sep 3, 2020
Messages
5
Location
london
Hi

Just dont know what to say, but I just want to try understand this diagnosis ive been given recently. I would like to listen to other people own experiences.

I pretty much gone underneath the radar of any mental health care/ support or medication. I managed my own mental wounds (BPD/ depression /Anxiety/ OCD) for 25 years with being in survival mode of fight or flight. From a young age ive had to survive and grow up in my own way not just from a mental aspect ( but socially, financially, no parents etc....) but everything a young human need to develop it into a balanced individual i never received.

But last years a sought of gave up was just so tired of this continuous circle of survival. This is when i was diagnosed with BPD and depression. Its so hard everyday trying to manage my own emotions but also trying to make ends meat, even though i super strong person. Hows do you all manage with your diagnosis day to day?

Thankyou to all who listen to my story and take care
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
2,758
Location
England
You must be super strong. It is sad that some people have to raise themselves and teach themselves things a parent should have done. I can understand why you were tired having to rely on yourself. Learning the hard way means life is harder overall.

I hope you are resting and being kind to yourself.

Are you having any treatment now?

There are lots of people on the forum who have struggled similarly.
 
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Rina2020

Member
Joined
Sep 3, 2020
Messages
5
Location
london
Thankyou so much for your Hug

Being Kind to ones self is the hardest thing to do for me. But i try and i will continue to try.
As i gave up last year which is a very sad/complicated story but Im here today. Which I deserve to be and everybody in world deserve to be.

Currently in my first 2 months of CBT ( also my mental health team trying to get be onto DBT and program especially supporting BPD (but extremely long waiting list and I may not eligible to certain program). Which i dont understand. But i know the NHS is so underfunded.

Hopefully i will kind the recipe to help me actually being kinder to myself and not to feel guilty. Fingercross. Internal piece in myself would be lovely.
 
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MuminAcrisis

Member
Joined
Jun 1, 2020
Messages
23
Location
Staffordshire
But everything has now changed. You have an answer, so now with that knowledge you can make a significant positive change to your life with some simple steps. Read books written by those who have lived with and recovered from BPD, gain information and get some DBT skills and therapy that will for the first time help you manage your disorder effectively. Mindfulness is a great start but takes time to learn start slow with a daily 5 minute session on Youtube and build it up. Find a DBT therapist you connect with and trust and you can also get self helping apps for it too.
You now have an answer you can use to plan a better future for yourself and those you love and care for. Look at 'Back From the Edge' BPD on Youtube it will help see how you can now move forward with the diagnosis. Wishing all the best xxx
 
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Prycejosh1987

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2020
Messages
620
Location
UK
The best thing to do is, battle the underlying issues and find a good coping method. This is what i do.
 
T

Tyche

Member
Joined
Jul 30, 2020
Messages
10
Location
uk
Hey im also recently diagnosed, and I've also held down multiple jobs the last 2 and a half years working 6/7 days a week, I would also say I have been pretty successful however this hasn't always been the case until I was 22 I was in and out of jobs and education like crazy. And ive stil had some days at work where my bpd has flared, ive had angry outbursts at work, shouting ect, and been close to just resigning, I suppose im also lucky my work is pretty understanding of my mental health although not fully aware of what exactly it is i suffer as I've only known myself the last year. I also started a solo adventure which was short lived due to my lack of motivation and impulsiveness not being able to make my mind up about anything, but I kept my old job part time for funding for my solo adventure so I haven't been out of a job in almost 3 years. Although I have been fairly successful in work, I am not great at budgeting and still had financial problems, im the "impulsive borderline" may i ask do you act out aggressively? Quiet borderlines tend to be the most high functioning and to an outsider probably dont come accross to be suffering any mental illness. They say bpd is a spectrum and I believe you can also move on the spectrum. I think i was more quiet borderline when I was younger I would never lash out at anyone, argue ect I'd always walk away i was pretty timid, but I'd beat myself up over it, I never self harmed much though, but as I've got older that has changed and now I have a very short fuse, and when I was younger I was more cautious, where as now I do risky things with little to no thought.
 
R

Rina2020

Member
Joined
Sep 3, 2020
Messages
5
Location
london
Hi Tyche
I do get angry but I don’t tend to display them in society now. I guess over the years I’ve learnt for me to function and to survive in society I had to make my own program up to control it

- where I try to rationalise everything in a basic form to diffuse myself (not to much emotional input). To me I try and rational my behaviour in positive way when I’m feeling irrationally negative in my head. If that makes sense.

But it’s extremely hard to maintain.
So the answer is yes I do get angry but I have to control it.


I also have impulsive tendency but mine is more linked to my OCD ie checking things etc...

It’s not luck that keeping your job its YOU. Don’t forgot that. Remember there are people and employers that are willing to support us (even though they don’t understand what we feel but they do what to help us, because they like us) So never forget that. Always remember the people who want to help and forgot about the people who don’t. Focus on your true people who want to help or want to understand you.

I hope you have a restful weekend
 
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