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Desperate for advice reagarding my Dad



New member
Sep 28, 2011
Hi Everyone

My Mum died 18 months ago and ever since my Dad's grief has bought on some really serious symtoms. In a nutshell he was wreckless driving and screaming while he was doing it, he then started self-harming and now is shoplifting (only very small value items and only when he is buying several other items). There is so much that has happened over the last 18 months that it is impossible to put it all in one post!!!! I have just come off Citalopram myself, I only went on it because of what I was going through with him, I was having panic attacks and was at my wits end.....and it really helped but I don't want to take a drug just to have to deal with my Dad's problems. I found out about the shoplifting last week and have cried myself to sleep every night since. He will not get help, I have tried and tried, I have even resorted to using emotional blackmail. I am terrified that he is going to get caught and I want to let his doctor know what is happening just incase he does, at least there will be something on record.....can I do that??

My Dad is 60 and I am 40, he has never had any mental health problems ever. I am really starting to resent him for what he is putting me through, its 18 months since my Mum died and I feel like I have not had a minute for my own grief. I am very lucky that I have an understanding husband who loves me more than anything in the world, but I just want to go to bed and not wake up for a couple of months so i do not have to deal with him!!!!!!

Please can someone help me or advise me........if anyone has had any experience could they please share it with me, I feel like I am losing my mind.

Thanks in advance.

Lavender x


Well-known member
Feb 3, 2012
You could ask for a Social worker, or go and talk to your GP. who might refer him for psychiatric assessment. If that doesn't work you can write and complain to the Health authority in your area.


Well-known member
Feb 28, 2012
Greif is a terrible thing he is probebly lonely missing your mum.Either it will work itself out or you need to talk to cab and ask them who you can talk to before he does get caught the courts are not very understanding.I think this system where you only get help after the crime has been comitted is a sad one.Get it down on files and then he might be let off litely.


Well-known member
Aug 10, 2010
Northern Ireland
Does he have any friends? Or doe she have a brother or sister or any other remaining family members? Is he religious? How about a priest or Iman, Rabbi whatever applies? Sorry for your loss.
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