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derealization and depersonalization (please respond)

U

UnrealEddie

New member
Joined
Sep 20, 2009
Messages
1
First of all i would like you to read this, the following are not my own words, but because i find it so hard to explain myself, and this is almost exactly how i feel i am going to copy and paste this what i found somewhere else on the internet..

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Sometimes, it's as if my hands and my body aren't mine. One minute, I stare at my hands, the hands I've always known were mine, but then there's that moment when they become disattached, I am looking at them from a third person perspective, they suddenly appear to move further and further away from me. I try to move them and it feels as if I'm not doing the moving, and they are someone else's hands, and something else is controlling them.

Sometimes I feel ghostly. I want to escape myself, and it feels like I'm flying away. I'm slowly levitating and I feel as if any minute I will lose my sense of self. I look into the mirror: is this me I am staring at? It's as if there's another consciousness there. And then, it's as if I've myself developped another consciousness, appart from my physical self.

The world around me becomes suddenly unreal and the environment seems like it's my imagination. I start to panic: I am put into this dream and I need to wake up. Everything around me starts to seem like it's a computer program and calculable. I'm not sure what to do with myself. I'm not sure what to do with my body. I pace around my appartment, searching for answers. Where is my mind? Where is my consciousness?

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So after reading that i hope you have some idea of what derealization and depersonalizaton may be like to experience.

My name is eddie, i am 17 years old from the UK england, and i am just going to be very bold about this and make a list of symptoms i have been experiencing over the past 3 months.

Heart palpitations (some times over 150 beats per minute)
Feeling like i am going to die
Derealization and depersonalizaton
irritational thoughts
wanting to die/commit suicide (due to the things i listed above)
depression

i am restricted on this forum to say what might be the cause of my symptoms, but i dont think that matters, because i have them now.. so the cause is irrelevent to me because it no longer exists, what matters to me now is working out how to stop these symptoms and get well again.

i have seen my doctor and had some blood tests done on my thyroid and stuff, mainly focusing on the heart issues. being unable to explain my symptoms with Derealization and depersonalizaton and depression, but after finding those few sentences i copied and pasted above for you to read, i am going to show that to be doctor hoping she might understand a little better what i am saying, because the way i explained it to her may have made me sound just a little bit "mad" and not actually getting it across as derealization and depersonalizaton.

i have not discussed anxiety with my doctor because i was so sure that my problem is not anxiety, i thought anxiety was a phycological disorder, and my problem seems so so pyhsical, but i am now taking anxiety into consideration with the understanding that anxiety can be physical aswel as phycological, and i am now prepared to accept anxiety as my problem if thats what it is.

my lifesyle is terrible. my diet consists of maybe 1 meal per day with no vegetables what so ever.. i might have fish and chips, and a meat pie and chips, microwaved pizza, that kind of thing, i am not over weight, i weigh around 150lbs, i recently quit smoking which i am doing really well with (3 weeks without a cigarette)

but i have this problem with derealization and depersonalizaton, "i think" i suffer from both, and mixed in with deep depression, and fear of having a serious heart problem, i just do not want to live anymore, i feel like i have forgotten myself, like i am living in a dream, and am seriously thinking of ending my life sooner rather than later,

i feel help-less.
 
intelgal

intelgal

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Mar 17, 2008
Messages
1,413
Location
Yorkshire
Ita all very scary and having had a period of depersonilisation during my life I can empathise how worrying it is.


There are many causes and it is imprtant to rule out any physical cause before diagnosis of an MH problems can occur.

The main thing is trying not to worry and speculate on what may or may not be 'wrong' with you.

Social anxiety and depression can occur for many reasons.

have you got someone you can talk to? If not it may be worth asking your GP for referral for talking therepy untill they get to the bottom of whats going on or if it does turn out to be a MH issue.

Take care

PS Try not to use the internet to diagnose... its always best to explain things in your own words
Intel
 
K

ktflyd

New member
Joined
Jul 11, 2010
Messages
3
Eddie, I myself am also 17 and going through the same. I don't believe I can say on here what may have triggered all of these symptoms for me but I feel like it's a never ending battle with this derealization and depersonalization.

I hope you find answers very soon, it is not a pleasant feeling.
Best wishes
 
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