- Jan 15, 2021
- Los Angeles, California
I am trying really hard to do okay. Coping has never been an easy thing for me to do. Since Sunday I have spent nearly 15 hours of the day asleep. Last night I attended a Codependents Anonymous meeting for the first time and it was informational, not quite inspiring, I couldn't quite relate to anyone in there and the topic was confusing. I will try some more this week. Today I finally got around to doing something for myself that I had been putting off for quite some time now, it was cool getting out of the house for a bit but I can't say I feel much sense of accomplishment. Tomorrow is my last day off from work so I will try again if I can find the energy. Right now I am unable to focus on the things that I need to get done at home and am angry at everyone, including my cat for wandering outside. I am now punishing him by making him wait in the cold for my forgiveness (okay I feel horrible now I will let him back inside) I got some great news today I will be having a niece, I don't think I am able to feel as much about this as I should, or normally would. Drugs are not getting me high and alcohol is not getting me drunk. That's it I think I have lost my ability to feel anything except for frequent crying spells that only last one minute and then I stare off into space like nothing happened. I've lost my marbles or something?