alexfay7.....i know how it feels to be severely depressed but suicide is not the answer. When i was depressed i lost all hope of getting better, i thought i would never get better. It was awful depression. But you do get better. And you are a much stronger person for it, much stronger than your peers. A s the saying goes what doesnt kill you, makes you stronger. You will get better. The depression will be overcome. Are you seeing a psychiatrist, are you on meds? Remember no matter how despairing you are there is hope, and there are plenty of people on this forum who have been there and care and understand.
Keep up posting on the forum for help and support. PM me anytime you feel low or just need someone to talk to.
Don't follow that link! I can understand that you feel so, but there is difference between feeling so and doing so. A lot of us have been where you are now, but decided that it was not wise to do so. We didn't do so and as time passed we felt better!
Depression - just like mania - is a temporary state of being. Especially in those with bipolar. One year ago (prior to my diagnosis) I was in a similar frame of mind. I had played it out in my head from beginning to end. It was all so logical and make complete sense as being the only option I had at the time. But I took just an hour to try and step back from those thoughts I played out the tape to the end. I became a spectator to my life. And I realized that the damage done to everyone left behind would be insurmountable. Just the happenstance of discovering my lifeless body would be a lifelong trauma for whoever that person was. I reached out to a close friend who within mere moments put me in touch with a mental health professional.
Now, a year later, I am a much much better place. I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 and am on an effective medication. I went through an intensive outpatient DBT program for 12 weeks, and have a counselor who once a week keeps me in track.
If I had gone through with what my thoughts and emotions were suggesting, I would be missing out on my daughter’s wedding, my son’s music gigs, my oldest daughter’s new puppy and discovering things I’m actually passionate about, like building furniture and learning to play the violin (badly). I’m also looking into returning to school at 55 years old to become social worker to help others like me.
Don’t give up. Ride out the hard times until you either see the other side of the depressive episode or are able to get some help. Nothing in this world is more devastating than ending your life.
Please don’t take your life. I know the heartache is causes as my brother took his own life and I will always miss him terribly and feel the guilt of his death. However I have also been where you are at to the point of having a great plan. But it’s definitely not the answer. Please get the help and medication that you need and keep posting on this forum because there are a lot of lovely kind people on here. Promise yourself you are strong enough to carry on