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Depressed, lonely, awkward. Anyone want to just shoot the breeze?

A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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Jul 21, 2021
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167
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California
Hey there. I just joined this forum to have someone to talk to, since I don't have any family that I'm close to or friends. I don't particularly care what we talk about, I just need some human contact before I go crazy.

Just to give you some brief information about me: I'm in my thirties, I'm bipolar, and I've been getting depressed an awful lot lately. I'm on a bunch of different dating sites in the hope that I can connect with someone, but I get very few matches, and I've not clicked with anyone that I have matched with, yet. That's kind of a blessing for me since I've literally no dating experience and that's something that's so far outside of my comfort zone.

My main hobbies right now are video games and taking care of my pond. If there are any gamers out there, maybe we can play something sometime? I play on the PC and the Switch. I play most everything except sports games.

The pond started as me throwing fish into my pool so that I didn't need to maintain it or pump out the water and has become a little old lady who swallowed the fly situation. It currently has a host of plants and animals in it and the appropriate filtration, but I'm trying to balance the ecosystem to make the water look less like pea soup. I think that the phosphate levels are too high (like really really high--some of the plants are dying), so I ordered some PhosGuard that should come tomorrow and we'll see how that goes.

Well, if you read this, thanks for stopping by. Say hello, please.
 
UpnDwn1978

UpnDwn1978

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Hi A fancy carp welcome to the forum :welcome:

What are your favorite games?
 
A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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California
Thanks for the welcome. I've been playing a lot of Monster Hunter World, Kerbal Space Program, and Oxygen Not Included lately. I've got varied tastes. I used to play single-player horror games like Silent Hill with a friend in high school, and I really miss that interaction. It was fun discussing the puzzles.
 
A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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That friend's response to depression was the opposite of mine. Her instinct was to push people away and mine was to get clingy so that friendship eventually ended. It lasted for a good number of years, though.
 
Bod

Bod

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I play on an xbox s and I don't like to even try any sport games at all last night I was playing Need for Speed remastered as it helps to to chill out later during the day here in the UK. I use to love gardening as when I left school many years ago I got a job in a florist shop.
 
A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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I've been enjoying working on my pond. I want to make another area for submerged plants, but the water is too cloudy right now for me to work in it. I'm hoping that the PhosGuard is effective at reducing the phosphate levels, which will, in turn, allow the current plants to reduce the nutrients in the water, which will, in turn, reduce the algae. I said that it was a little old lady who swallowed the fly situation.
 
Bod

Bod

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While you are working on your pond a great thing to do if you can is, if you have a camera at all then take photos of how the pond looks at different times when the sun is shining on it and at different angles. Just a thought.
 
M

ManDss

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We can talk if you need, in private message if that is what are you needing. But I really dont like anything about video games. But if you need "someone to talk to prevent get crazy", Im here. Ive got crazy due dont have anyone to talk
 
A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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Bod, I might do that eventually. Right now, it's just pea soup. The fish seem okay, though. I hope that they stay okay until I can balance the ecosystem. Although the lilies open during the day and close at night. That's neat.

ManDss, we don't need to talk about video games. I just need some human interaction because my isolation isn't doing great things for my depression. I also do a lot of home repair. I have a garage full of tools and the overconfidence to use them. I plan to build a waterfall for my pond eventually. Maybe a bridge too.
 
A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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Jul 21, 2021
Messages
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California
Added the PhosGuard to the pond. I'll take a phosphate reading in a few hours to see if there's a change, but the last time that I took a reading it was off the chart (over 10 ppm). The pond water looked clearer this morning. Maybe it was because I tried a different flocculant a few days ago. The old one was made by API and the new one is Seachem, if anyone cares.

Found a dead fish too. :(
 
A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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California
Took another phosphate reading and it's still off the charts. I moved the PhosGuard packets somewhere else in the hope that they'll get better circulation there.

I think that I'm drinking too much.

No matches on Tinder today. Feeling ugly and depressed. Maybe I should ask my psychiatrist to increase my dosage.
 
Wishbone

Wishbone

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I love the idea of the pond. When I was younger I used to fish a lot over a span of about 5 years and got madly into all the different types of fish. I've always been an animal nut. Every spring the fish spawn here in the local waterways, I liked going to watch them. I didn't go out to see any this year but in recent years I've done so and seen the Carp, one of which included a Ghost Koi that someone had obviously got rid of (this was in a canal). I loved watching them more than catching them. I think that one stems from my fishing days when I used to learn about the Chub by watching where they liked to hang out etc. I'm also a bit of a flower nut now too (I go through phases) and have some lilies that are well suited to pond edging or boggy ground. I don't know anything about keeping a pond and fish maintained though - keep doing what you're doing. I really need a good solid hobby!
 
A Fancy Carp

A Fancy Carp

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California
I have koi and mosquitofish. I like watching the koi nibble on this and that and hop out of the water and generally do fish stuff. I just got some new lillies, but the water is too cloudy for me to work in the pond right now so I just have it sitting in the pond in a pot. The heat's also brutal, so I can't even go out there and cut up some bricks in preparation for making a little planter box.
 
HOUNDDOG2021

HOUNDDOG2021

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Jul 22, 2021
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LONDON
I often feel the same way, I don't have any friends apart from 1 but are friendship has become distant and feels one-sided. I'd like to meet new people and make new friendships but no one ever seems to be interested in forming a friendship with me.

I feel like I try to hard and that maybe pushes people away because I come across as a desperate. If anyone ever wants to chat, feel free to message me.
 
T

turnitoffandonagain_again

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May 27, 2020
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UK
"Shoot the breeze" is such an odd phrase. Wonder how it came about? (On-line all I can find is that it started in the US around 1880).

Can one machine-gun the wind or bomb the tornado?
 
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