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Depressed in public

  • Thread starter DepressedTransGirl
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DepressedTransGirl

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Dec 28, 2019
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Being social while depressed


As anyone who is depressed knows...being social is very hard while depressed. When i'm in public i often feel very depressed...especially when it seems like people are having the time of their life and i'm here being depressed wondering what's wrong with me...why can't i enjoy life. This thought can cause me drift off completely...it kind of feels like an out of body experience. And not to mention feeling extra-extra irritable and wanting to avoid people while in public.

Today i went clubbing, which was hard for me to do. My best friend asked me to come along and i thought i'd give it a try despite being depressed. It took considerable effort to enjoy myself. While standing on the dance floor i felt myself drift off mentally thinking about how unhappy i am, all while being surrounded by bright lights, people dancing and loud music.

My depression makes me want to withdraw into nothingness (literally). For me withdrawal is usually the first step to acting on my suicidal thoughts. At that point i get to a deeply lonely state, feeling like i have nothing to life for and it's just me desperately wanting to release the pain that i've carried for years.
 
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hairybanana

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Australia
Being social while depressed


As anyone who is depressed knows...being social is very hard while depressed. When i'm in public i often feel very depressed...especially when it seems like people are having the time of their life and i'm here being depressed wondering what's wrong with me...why can't i enjoy life. This thought can cause me drift off completely...it kind of feels like an out of body experience. And not to mention feeling extra-extra irritable and wanting to avoid people while in public.

Today i went clubbing, which was hard for me to do. My best friend asked me to come along and i thought i'd give it a try despite being depressed. It took considerable effort to enjoy myself. While standing on the dance floor i felt myself drift off mentally thinking about how unhappy i am, all while being surrounded by bright lights, people dancing and loud music.

My depression makes me want to withdraw into nothingness (literally). For me withdrawal is usually the first step to acting on my suicidal thoughts. At that point i get to a deeply lonely state, feeling like i have nothing to life for and it's just me desperately wanting to release the pain that i've carried for years.
Amazing effort getting out and being social when you’re struggling with all that. It happens a lot to me as well. Just waves of it crashing down on you. Keep going out, doesn’t have to be out at clubs, just keep being around people 👍
 
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Kayaker

Former member
I feel the same way as you. That's why I avoid going out with people that I don't have deep confidence in. No point in getting out with a bunch of people who don't care about my problems.
 
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SadRainbow

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But seriously, well done for going out! Maybe it's too much right now - can you aim for something smaller - meeting a friend for lunch or a drink?
 
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DepressedTransGirl

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I feel the same way as you. That's why I avoid going out with people that I don't have deep confidence in. No point in getting out with a bunch of people who don't care about my problems.
Your right, surround yourself with the people who understand where your coming from.
 
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DepressedTransGirl

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But seriously, well done for going out! Maybe it's too much right now - can you aim for something smaller - meeting a friend for lunch or a drink?
I'll probably try and get dinner in a cafe with friends more often, one small step at a time!
 
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LouieLou

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Wales
Its hard but ot impossible,I am going out more now and feel I am getting stronger and fighting back the depression on my own terms. Iam thinking of walking to town to see my friend and getting the bus back before picking up kids from school. Then plan in town what to get them for dinner. Will aimto take the dog out before I meet my friend at noon. But at the same time you heed your meds tweaked to give you the best foundation to build on.
 
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Bod

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Pretty Good
That is really great that you forced your self to go out with a friend, when I go out I don't get depressed but I can feel on edge a bit as I do not trust strangers on the streets anymore.
 
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DepressedTransGirl

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Netherlands
That is really great that you forced your self to go out with a friend, when I go out I don't get depressed but I can feel on edge a bit as I do not trust strangers on the streets anymore.
Omg yess! that is exactly how i feel...i feel on edge and i'm more stand off-ish towards strangers, because of lack of trust. It's a pessimistic and melancholic feeling that comes over me.
 
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DepressedTransGirl

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Netherlands
Its hard but ot impossible,I am going out more now and feel I am getting stronger and fighting back the depression on my own terms. Iam thinking of walking to town to see my friend and getting the bus back before picking up kids from school. Then plan in town what to get them for dinner. Will aimto take the dog out before I meet my friend at noon. But at the same time you heed your meds tweaked to give you the best foundation to build on.
I'm happy to hear that going out has helped you manage your depression! I'm looking forward to be where you're at with dealing with depression.
 
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