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Depressed & feel so alone

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xlilhboox

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Feb 11, 2015
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Ok well, I suffer with depression & I have up days & down days but recently I've just felt utterly sh*t & so alone. Ive tried talking to close friends but well they just seem to brush me off & seem like they're not really bothered. I just feel although they only want me when times are rough for them but when I need to confide in them they just don't want to know. I try & get myself to go out & do things, like go & see friends but again they always brush me off. I just feel so ignored. I just lock myself away in my room & yesterday, it took me all day to finally pluck up the courage to go to the shop to buy two items! I try to explain to my close friends what im going through & certain things I find hard to do & although they say that they understand, I know they don't. I just feel so lost & well given up on, if that makes any sense... I don't want to feel like this anymore, but I always feel when ive had a rubbish day, that the "dark" part at the back of my mind where I try to push my negative thoughts too, always try's to creep back & makes me feel so numb & well like im in my own little bubble, like im not here but I am? & my minds going 1000x faster than normal & everything becomes a blur. It's all so confusing & draining. I'd be so grateful for any help & advice. :low:
 
Toasted Crumpet

Toasted Crumpet

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Hiya,

I dunno about advice really, but just wanted to say hello and sorry you're feeling so alone. I hope being on here will help as people here understand what it's like to feel that way. I think a lot of people who haven't had depression just don't get it. I don't know your friends, so I don't know whether they do care but just don't understand, or they are the fair weather type, but either it's hard when people don't get you or seem to use you when it's convenient for them.

I have known people like that myself I know it's not nice.

How long have you been feeling this way? Are you getting any other support at all? Like counselling, therapy?

Sorry for the questions, you don't have to answer if you don't want to xx
 
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xlilhboox

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Peterborough, UK
Hello, Thankyou so much for spending the time to read & reply to my post. & since I've found this forum site, it's helped, I know that im not alone in what & how im feeling & the help & advice given from others is great! :) Ive had depression now for 2years, I had PND after having my son & it's just triggered from there & Ive been on & off anti depressants & have tried counselling as I thought it might be different instead of being on anti depressants cause I don't want to feel although I have to depend on them, you know? but it didn't seem to work for me, felt although it's just like talking to anyone else. :/
 
Toasted Crumpet

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Did the antidepressants help at all?

Counselling, I think it depends, on what type of therapy it is and the relationship with the counsellor. Psychotherapy tends to be a bit deeper. I can see how if the counselling is the type where the therapist doesn't really say much or offer interpretations it might feel like talking to anyone.

You said your friends are not really that supportive, is there any other good support you do have? As I would think being alone with a young child might be quite difficult? x
 
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janni

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Feb 5, 2015
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Sometimes people just suck.. simple as that . People are sometimes so self involved that it really has nothing to do with you ...they are just too involved with themselves. I get what you feel. Felt it last night and may crash again later. It's horribly painful. Can you go for a walk? Treat yourself to something? Rent a movie? anything to ease the pain for just a bit.
 
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janni

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as for the counseling I think it really depends on what you are looking for.
If you are having negative thoughts that need restructuring and you want to learn how to do that then sure.
I have a doc I see. Can't say it's really helped. He doesn't do much for me when I am in a depressed state and I usually feel worse to be honest. But it's individual and does help a lot of people
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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There's not much I can really add to what's already been said.

Obviously it's different depending on each person, but i've been helped a lot by counselling and medication.

I have to also agree with Janni - some people simply aren't that great at being there for someone who's having a bad time. It could be that they don't know what to say to you or how to just be present, it could be that they're absorbed in their own stuff, could be all sorts of reasons.. but it's not necessarily anything to do with you. :hug1:

I think having depression makes you quite empathetic to others and i'm not sure if anybody can truly understand how hard mental health issues can be unless you've experienced them yourself.

I also agree with the suggestion of doing little things for yourself that are nice and you'd enjoy. A film, some chocolates, an interesting magazine - whatever floats your boat.
 
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xlilhboox

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Peterborough, UK
They did for a while but I got too used to taking one & it didn't have much of an effect on me so I decided to take two tablets & I then got told that I was overdosing by my doctor :/ & yes that's exactly what it felt like & it was only for half hour a week. & no not really, I hardly speak to my siblings & well I have my mum but she's never really been there for me...but that's another story I guess & my son he's staying with my mum temporarily at the moment. :(
 
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xlilhboox

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Peterborough, UK
Thankyou for your reply & advice. Well I just kinda loose interest in some things, you know? Like some days I could just lay in bed for hours on end watching rubbish tv & just not have the energy to get myself up, it just drains it out of you :( when I am up & about i tend to just do cleaning & the house work to take my mind off certain things & try & kill time, I'd also like to go for walks but I find it a tad weird on my own unless I have a reason to go out, with the way im feeling ive found it hard to even go to the shop which is literally just around the corner but when I do I just kinda reassure myself there was nothing to be worried about after all, you know? Like im so conscious of what people think & I hate the thought of people looking & stareing at me, so I just worry myself to the point where I just get upset. :(
 
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