Depersonalization derealisation , anxiety and fear of losing my mind , or going crazy

J

Juliesrv

New member
Joined
Aug 9, 2018
Messages
2
#1
Depersonalization derealisation , anxiety and fear of losing my mind , or going crazy

Hello,

So here is my actual situation (and sorry for the long post!) : I’ve been having severe anxiety for four years or so, and I’ve experienced episodes of depersonalization/déréalisation that lasted max a few weeks but were exhausting and oh so frightening.
Today I don’t feel so good, because my huge fear of being « crazy », or losing my mind has come knocking again, and I experience DP/DR in a different way, which makes me question whether it is actually DP/DR or the beginning of a psychosis. It freaks me OUT.
So nothing feels real, nothing feels FAMILIAR, not even myself and I find myself in a very weird atmosphere, like I am lost (but still conscious about what’s happening), and I feel constantly empty and detached from my emotions. When I remember my childhood I feel like this little girl is a different person than me, I feel like my family home isn’t familiar anymore... like I’m not myself anymore.
And I am so scared of actually loosing myself in the depths of my anxiety, never being the happy me again.. or even becoming another person ??!
what do you guys think ? Have you ever experienced anything like that? Any tips ? Because my only desire is to feel good again... but I feel so depressed and lost that I don’t even think that’s possible anymore.
Thank you.
 
frogsplash

frogsplash

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 30, 2017
Messages
235
#2
hi i would recommend speaking to your doctor, perhaps they will recommend you take something short or long term which will reduce your anxiety, and also/or alternatively they might help you with regards to getting some therapy
 
J

johnybgood

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Joined
Oct 15, 2018
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2
Location
Vancouver Canada
#3
paranoid Schizophrenic speaks back

I have paranoid schizophrenia. Maybe you have depression instead of maybe so much anxiety. I Know that when I was beginning to to feel not real, I started to speak to myself. Its such a pity to be in that uncontrollable state, a sort of a waste of life. But now it is controlled with an injection of Invega, but in a few months I will cut down on it switched to oral meds. The thing is the meds make me sleep way to much and be too too tired all day.
But when you feel unreal, is it because of an over powering voice in your head? I had some memories of my childhood today, very pleasant and self fullfiling, made me realize that I AM LIKE THAT YOUNGER VERSION OF MYSELF. YOu just need the right situation or insight to open up that channel of your memories perhaps, say being around a parent, and comparing something, a situation, around you to that time way back. Of course you are the same person as when you were a child, we all are, just more grown up now.:scared:;):)
 
L

Luxin

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2018
Messages
8
#4
October 18, 2018

Dear one Juliesrv,

That's a serious thing you've got going on, beyond my experience. But I know this: If you are taking substances of any kind, including worst of all, prescribed antidepressants etc., and if you really want to feel normal again you should go cold turkey on all of them, even aspirin or tylenol, that harm the liver. Our minds are negative enough without interfering with their function with drugs.

Fear can't be avoided, but you can distract yourself with constructive activities. Singing, telling stories and exercise produces natural drugs, endorphins, Nature's rewards for constructive expression. Get out into nature if you can and it's safe, and begin deep breathing if you start feeling like your old self (not before then). At least open some windows.

Avoid watching TV and nightmarish news or online media till you're better. Listen to light pop or classical music -- no rap, heavy metal or overemotional romantic stuff. Read 'children's' books like those of Dick King-Smith; adults need them too, coz we either are or should be just as innocent as kids.

Loving yourself, being kind to yourself are essential to your recovery. If drugs or any substances are in your picture, QUIT THEM and avoid them like the plague from then on.

If someone really loves you, fine, but loving yourself is always better and always the starting point.

Love, Luxin
;)
 

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