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...Delusional?

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HospitalForSouls

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In the past a lot of bad things happened to me as a result of others. I had abuse from a young age and was also witness to it. I used to report the abuse, but the police never believed me, because the one responsible always bursts in to fake tears, claiming that 'I'm insane' and that I'm delusional and imagining everything. For example, last night I was physically assaulted. Then, after assaulting me, the person in question told me they would call the police. So, knowing I'd done nothing wrong, I said 'fine, call them, I've done nothing wrong' to which the response was 'I'll make something up'. Then the person decided they didn't want to call the police (Surprise, surprise...). I was stressed so I self-harmed (nothing serious) and then I called the police. I told them what happened and they interviewed the person responsible and they gave the police their usual tears and 'He's a maniac' routine. The police came back and said they didn't believe me, that I was lying, claimed I was delusional, took me to A&E and told me not to leave for at least 8 hours. At this point I was very stressed.. I have been diagnosed in the past by CMHT with BPD and am prone to having psychotic episodes, but things like this happening constantly are making me lose my grip. Either people that are supposed to love me and care for me, people that I trust, my family are abusing me and lying to me, which is a world that I don't want to live in and I might as well pack it all in now... or I'm completely delusional and I don't know what's real and what's not and the more this kind of thing seems to happen, the more that I am uncertain as to which of these things is happening to me
 
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Toasted Crumpet

Toasted Crumpet

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You are not delusional imo but look up Gaslighting as this sounds like what that person has done to you - ie them denying what they did and making out you are mad.

I think there are some threads on the forum somewhere on gaslighting, I am not sure where though as they are quite old.

I think with people who have BPD it is quite common that we have been treated this way, ie invalidated, not believed etc

Ok I have found the link I will post below but might take a while for them to show up as mods have to approve links
 
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HospitalForSouls

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Feb 5, 2015
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Location
Birmingham, UK
Thank you very much. It's good to know that this is more commonplace than I thought and so I'll have some grounding for the moment and won't break down tonight
 
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