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Dealing with party anxiety at college

Dingo16

Dingo16

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Jan 13, 2020
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Hey, so I just got to college last week and so far every night there have been parties on my floor going until like 2am, I've never been much of a partier (just never thought it was fun and big crowds make me nervous) and I try to stay away from drugs and alcohol since I had abuse issues in high school. Long story short, I know that I don't want to be at these parties but I am still experiencing F.O.M.O. (fear of missing out) when its right outside my door. I've tried tuning them out by keeping myself busy and listening to stuff on headphones but its not really working. Its making me super anxious and I always end up freaking out. It also doesn't help that my mom criticizes me for not being a part of them. Any tips?
 
ht46

ht46

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Nov 10, 2019
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Pluto
I wouldn't be encouraging you to party I'd encourage you to pass that's the most important thing.

It's helpful to have your head screwed on with parties etc some people will over do it and fail like me, there's nothing wrong with not partying.

If you feel like your missing out go for a beer or two if you can manage it and say hi there's nothing wrong with that, just maintain discipline with your studies it's the most important thing.
 
P

Pollypop

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Jul 23, 2015
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2,245
Location
England. Derbyshire
Hey, so I just got to college last week and so far every night there have been parties on my floor going until like 2am, I've never been much of a partier (just never thought it was fun and big crowds make me nervous) and I try to stay away from drugs and alcohol since I had abuse issues in high school. Long story short, I know that I don't want to be at these parties but I am still experiencing F.O.M.O. (fear of missing out) when its right outside my door. I've tried tuning them out by keeping myself busy and listening to stuff on headphones but its not really working. Its making me super anxious and I always end up freaking out. It also doesn't help that my mom criticizes me for not being a part of them. Any tips?
Is it possible to change your room away from this floor?
I had the same problem ( many years ago)
I never thought of asking if I could change and I think I would have been too
nervous to ask.

Maybe things will calm down when college work gets into full swing.
If not, and it is affecting your work then try to take some action.
I really wish that I had done this.
Good luck.
 
fragrant_violet

fragrant_violet

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Mar 29, 2021
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Tirana
There's nothing to stop you going to the party, introducing yourself, drinking a quick soda and saying goodnite.

The advantage is that you will meet folk and they will appreciate your joining in. The fact you only drunk soda tells everybody your not a party goer so you dont need to make excuses.

Knowing the folk holding the party will help you cope with the disturbance.

Just give it a go. You got nowt to lose
 
fragrant_violet

fragrant_violet

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Mar 29, 2021
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Tirana
Yep I think you should go for it. College is the one time in your life you will be able to rebrand yourself. Nobody k ows you so you can start afresh. Your dealing with the more enlightened half of the population. Few will judge you. Be prepared to say 'I get bad social anxiety but I'm working on so please excuse me if I come across as a bit rude or odd '
 
Keesha

Keesha

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Apr 19, 2019
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School is a big commitment but a privileged one at that . You’ve already confessed to having previous drug & alcohol issues already in high school.

You only get this one time to do this.
Why screw it up? You’ve got your entire life to party. What you do with your time now will have one of the biggest impacts on your life.

Find other groups of students who do other things for fun. Ask to be transferred. If you told those in charge that you’d like to be moved since you’ve had issues in the past with substance abuse I can’t see that being met with anything but respectful consideration.
 
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