Dealing with "ocd and signs" Please read.

P

Pearl8

Guest
#1
Hi guys, it's been a while since I've posted on here but I felt like talking about a topic I have been having a lot of trouble with and maybe some of you might also.

I've been dealing with ocd for almost 8 months now which includes a topic like hocd, and honestly it had gotten better but recently what's been bothering me is that taking things as signs while dealing with ocd. For example one day I was hanging out with my boyfriend and I was just frustrated with my ocd themes and stuff and he knows about every theme I go through because I tell him since my ocd makes me feel guilty if I didnt, I'm lucky he understands that it's not the "real me". Moving on, so one day I was just ranting to him about like i wish god could just tell me why all this is happening, and a few seconds later my friend who is same sex texted me, but to let you know I was expecting a text back from her cause prior to that I had texted her asking something but i worry about this being a sign. So this has been really bothering me and it's been scaring me and makes me feel like i have false attraction which I don't want. I mean I'm almost 19 before this I never even crushed on a girl and thought about all this before so why is it like bothering me so much, but of course ocd doesnt let you think logically right?
Moving on, today i saw a girl but obviously the thing about my ocd is if i see anyone pretty it will think i like her and etc, but so my anxiety was rising but at the same time I noticed she was kind of crippled so i felt bad and all right, and it's like my ocd is trying to make me think you like her but I know my heart actually sank cause I felt bad and all so that feeling of feeling bad for her mixed with my anxiety about to rise makes it seem like i have feelings for her, and then my mind started with racing with more thoughts about oh what if this is a sign about all u been worrying about it all day what if its cause of this being a sign... and then I get home go on twitter and see a tweet saying don't ignore signs like with?! honestly can someone help me, I feel so out of place it's like everytime I manage it and reduce anxiety it comes right back up.

I also know that like once your worried about something you become so hyper aware that if you notice things relating to the topic you seem to notice it more rather then if you weren't going through ocd it probably wouldnt have caught your attention.

Thanks!
 
S

Smile_Like_An_Idiot

New member
Joined
Jan 7, 2016
Messages
4
#2
To be honest, I don't have OCD, so I have no room to speak to that... But I overthink everything and overanylize everything that everyone says, ever. I know that you want an answer immediately, but the only consolation I have is to trust that eventually, you will know. It may be hard right now, dealing with guilt and questioning your own thoughts, but I promise that everything will make sense soon. <3<3<3