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Dating with Schizophrenia

vangoghs

vangoghs

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Austin, TX
Have any of you done this? If so, what have your experiences been like? Best and worse?

I haven't dated anyone, since I was fourteen, long before the onset of my schizophrenia, but I am curious.
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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I find it near impossible to date, then folk proclaim you gay. That is not right, perhaps it was truer 30 years ago when women would date more freely and with more enthusiasm.
 
L

Lab rat

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No problems with dating, quite the opposite! I havent been single since 13… 47-13=34 years! Been married twice had an uncountable number of relationships, been engaged 8 times… i think im due a break! 😂
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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I wasn't diagnosed with schizophrenia but that's where peoples minds go to when I tell them I'm a voice hearer.

I had zero success with women who had no mental health issues, I found a mental health dating site and met a lovely woman who is bipolar and has had psychosis in the past (my diagnosis back in 2016 was psychosis) but after meeting in person she asked if we could just be friends as she didn't feel stable enough for a relationship.

I then met a woman who was a voice hearer like myself and she was very much into me but tragically she took her own life in early July.

But the woman who is bipolar has come back and asked me if I am still interested in her, I told her yes so as of last Wednesday we're giving a relationship a try, she's so affectionate, caring and would do anything for anyone if it's in her power to help, the loyalty she inspires from her family and friends is amazing, I couldn't have asked for a nicer woman.

So now I have a girlfriend and things are looking up. Without my condition I would have never met her so being a voice hearer with a history of psychosis has had certain advantages.
 
Lone_wanderer

Lone_wanderer

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I've had plenty of girlfriends since I have been diagnosed with Schizophrenia, a few I met at support groups or in the grounds of the psych unit while out for a walk. Some I have just met in a bar or club. I have had one relationship that lasted for 10 years and we are still best friends.
 
H

haystack

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In the beginning after being stabilized from sz I had sexual side effects from risperdal and it made me hopeless. Then I found another med and have been successful dating and marrying first back in 07, married to another schizophrenic, mistake, we made horrible decisions financially becuase we both were delusional...divorced in '13. dated after that and now I am engaged to be married sept. 16th !! don't give up...
 
L

Lab rat

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I hear you brother about the risperidone, i had the same problems 😡
 
B

blue_monday

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I don’t have schizophrenia (I have BPD) but I am dating a guy with schizophrenia. He is caring, sweet, affectionate and has shown more interest in me than any guy ever has before (which helps reassure my anxious heart)
However, in recent weeks his mental health has declined and he’s become less talkative. I asked if everything was okay and he told me he wasn’t being intentionally quiet and that he was struggling. I offered my support and asked how I could help him and if he needed some space. The past week he has gone silent and hasn’t replied to my messages. With me having serious abandonment issues, I’ve become incredibly anxious and messaged asking if I had done anything wrong and if he didn’t want to see me anymore. He still hasn’t replied. I’m wondering if he is just ghosting me or is genuinely struggling to talk to me right now for whatever reason. Does anyone have any suggestions as to what is going on? I’m trying my best not to focus on it in the hopes he will come back to me but past experiences are making me anxious as hell.
 
H

haystack

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you might be waiting a long time if he has become delusional...was he on meds? for sure? if he's off meds he probably has some delusion about you is why he probably isn't replying...paranoia can really interrupt relationships when one is delusional...not trying to make you worry more...
 
B

blue_monday

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you might be waiting a long time if he has become delusional...was he on meds? for sure? if he's off meds he probably has some delusion about you is why he probably isn't replying...paranoia can really interrupt relationships when one is delusional...not trying to make you worry more...
He isn’t on meds, no. I am just trying to figure out what could have possibly happened as things were going well and I assumed the fact he was telling me about his recent struggles was a positive sign that he trusted me. I care about him so much I am willing to try and understand what may be going through his mind, although I appreciate I will never fully understand. Thank you for your response
 
H

haystack

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if he isn't on meds he's paranoid...it could be about anything...best to keep clear of him or contact a mutual friend to say you're concerned...maybe you can convince him to take meds or see a psychiatrist ...
 
B

blue_monday

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if he isn't on meds he's paranoid...it could be about anything...best to keep clear of him or contact a mutual friend to say you're concerned...maybe you can convince him to take meds or see a psychiatrist ...
Thanks for your input I appreciate it. I will give him some space and hope he comes back to me
 
vangoghs

vangoghs

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Dec 14, 2020
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170
Location
Austin, TX
I don’t have schizophrenia (I have BPD) but I am dating a guy with schizophrenia. He is caring, sweet, affectionate and has shown more interest in me than any guy ever has before (which helps reassure my anxious heart)
However, in recent weeks his mental health has declined and he’s become less talkative. I asked if everything was okay and he told me he wasn’t being intentionally quiet and that he was struggling. I offered my support and asked how I could help him and if he needed some space. The past week he has gone silent and hasn’t replied to my messages. With me having serious abandonment issues, I’ve become incredibly anxious and messaged asking if I had done anything wrong and if he didn’t want to see me anymore. He still hasn’t replied. I’m wondering if he is just ghosting me or is genuinely struggling to talk to me right now for whatever reason. Does anyone have any suggestions as to what is going on? I’m trying my best not to focus on it in the hopes he will come back to me but past experiences are making me anxious as hell.
Have you tried talking to him in person?

Just because he isn't taking medication, doesn't mean that he is paranoid. Did he explain to you why he has chosen not to take medication? Can you respect this decision?

I also don't take medication, and I am pretty functional, mostly, and, generally, not too paranoid.
 
vangoghs

vangoghs

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Dec 14, 2020
Messages
170
Location
Austin, TX
I find it near impossible to date, then folk proclaim you gay. That is not right, perhaps it was truer 30 years ago when women would date more freely and with more enthusiasm.
I think some people assume that I am a closeted lesbian, sometimes. Schizophrenia has had the effect, for me, of making the idea of sex distasteful. I am curious about dating, a bit, though. Before, I was a shut-in, and hardly met anyone, but, was otherwise a bisexual with a healthy attitude toward sex and dating.
 
vangoghs

vangoghs

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Dec 14, 2020
Messages
170
Location
Austin, TX
No problems with dating, quite the opposite! I havent been single since 13… 47-13=34 years! Been married twice had an uncountable number of relationships, been engaged 8 times… i think im due a break! 😂
How long do your relationships tend to last?
 
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