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cycles

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nattyone

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Joined
Mar 25, 2010
Messages
82
im interested in how people cycle , ive been trying to work out if mine follow a pattern , for years they seemed to but since ive been on meds it seems harder to follow.

i spoke to my x boyfreind who i lived with for 5 years . he said the manic episodes were really easy to spot and usually lasted a month or two , he thinks i had 2 or three of those in a year.

i asked him about depressed phases and normal and he said he couldnt really tell. he said directly after a manic phase i would be very exhausted and in pain so it was hard to tell if that was a normal thing or pain related .

part of the problem is my moods never change on the first of each month, which is damned inconsiderate of them because it would make figuring this whole thing out much easier.

september and october was either normal or manic , probabbly manic but i dont know wether it started in august or wether that was a normal bit , i simply cannot rember anything . november and december im thinking were normal , but then since i cant properly rember december maybe that was a depressed phase , since there is no evidence of me having done anything .

i know sometime in november or early december i made arrangements to get a job . i was due to start in the beggining of january but things started to go a little pair shaped a couple weeks before . sods law . its possible i was depressed sometime between the end of december and the middle of january but it couldnt have lasted long , i just rember being in pain and upset . end of january and thru february and into this month i definatly built up a manic episode right now i seem to keep flicking in and out of it hour by hour , i think im coming down out of it for sure.

so what id like to know is , can a manic episode be so much more noticeable than a depressive episode and last much longer ? is this because of the meds? how the heck is normal defined is that the feel nothing phase ?

when i spoke to my x b/f he was sure that the depressed phase lasted longer than the manic but that it was hard to seperate it from normal so he couldnt put a time span on it or tell me for sure how many i had a year.

grr i cant figure this out and i really really need to know im almost sure my depressed stage lasts no more than a week or so lately and thats why i dont rate it .

can the cycle change and is it always the same , like is each manic episode the same length and each depressed the same , can u go from manic to normal and back into manic with no noticeable length of depression in between .

if i manage to succesfully plot my moods for a whole year will that be how it will be next year or is there no point since im just about to change meds ?

scuse me i have a head full of crap right now .

i hope u can help me xxx
 
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TOONAFISH

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Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
2,686
Location
Bonnie Scotland
I have asked all these questions too. I have only had one manic episode that i know of, but lots of depressive ones. I asked when to expect my next one, how long they last etc etc. but all they said was everyone is different and each episode is different. xx
 
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nattyone

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Joined
Mar 25, 2010
Messages
82
dont u find it frustrating ? im desperate to know where all this is headed cos im tired of going round in circles with my life and i want to be able to tell whats coming next before it hits . my judgement seems to be flawed most of the time so it would be usefull to be able to find a way to figure out in advance if this is a month where im gonna make dumb ass decisions .
 
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>.<

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
113
Location
UK
You can't predict them unfortunately :( Would be great if you could, then you could plan things accordingly, get help before it gets bad and stuff, it would all be a lot easier.

I've had one manic episode (I think), a few hypomanic, and 4 depressive episodes :(
 
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nattyone

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Joined
Mar 25, 2010
Messages
82
Dib this is what happens to me , I seem to have a long mood and then little moods within that , I didn't know if this was a normal person thing or a bipolar thing . It's very confusing . My life is so unstable because I will have a period of being ok for maybe a fee months , think I'm fine , make plans and then before I can act on them I'm feeling bad again , that usually lasts just long enough to scare me into not doing them. Then at the other end I make elaborate plans which are much more adventurous and inspired but then a month or two later um like how the hell did I think I could do that. Then I get really miserable and angry that I'm so useless because I have all these dreams and ideas but I'm so incompetant I can't do them . It's shit because whatever mood I'm in it's all pointless . Even the good times never have a permanant succesfull outcome that lasts any longer than the mood .
 
dib4uk

dib4uk

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Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
2,182
Location
south london,england
Dib this is what happens to me , I seem to have a long mood and then little moods within that , I didn't know if this was a normal person thing or a bipolar thing . It's very confusing . My life is so unstable because I will have a period of being ok for maybe a fee months , think I'm fine , make plans and then before I can act on them I'm feeling bad again , that usually lasts just long enough to scare me into not doing them. Then at the other end I make elaborate plans which are much more adventurous and inspired but then a month or two later um like how the hell did I think I could do that. Then I get really miserable and angry that I'm so useless because I have all these dreams and ideas but I'm so incompetant I can't do them . It's shit because whatever mood I'm in it's all pointless . Even the good times never have a permanant succesfull outcome that lasts any longer than the mood .
Awww im sorry to hear that, it sounds like its awfull to live with.:eek: Nattyone that does sound like a typical bipola. For me i wish that my moods was more stable and that i could look forward to most things or even just everyday activities. I used to be hyper one day, and then depressed another day or half a day, but with mood staberlisers im not hyper as i used to be, i find myself to be more depressive scoring -1 to -4 over the week.
 
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nattyone

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 25, 2010
Messages
82
dib it is awefull , it makes me doubt my own reactions to things as i cant tell when something really is a good plan or if im being overly depressed and then it could be a good plan but sounds like a bad plan and vice versa for the happy times.
 
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