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CTO Depot tomorrow

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albagobragh

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I'm half tempted not to turn up. Thankfully other posters have shared their experiences. Last time I'll be seeing my excellent CPN too. All in all not a good day.
 
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Zoe1

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oh im so sorry you wont be seeing your CPN any more
that is really hard ... this has happened to me many times
and each time I cant imagine being able to trust anyone else

but finally there will be someone
your having a good relationship with the CPN
shows that you are capable of having trust
and being brave about seeking someone else

:grouphug:
 
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albagobragh

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Thanks Zoe1. It took a while to trust her but I do, even though she infuriates me a times regarding medication. She makes the depot painless though. She studied with her replacement colleague though so I'm optimistic.
 
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Zoe1

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yes even better you could accept her infuriating parts !
I have a sketchy idea of trust
but I imagine thats also a good sign if you can accept all that

keep posting about how it goes with the replacement
 
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albagobragh

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So the depot is done and dusted for another month. :unsure:

Said my goodbyes to my CPN - it was difficult - and met my new one. She seems a very formidable lady. :)
 
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Zoe1

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k you put a smile there
does that mean you are OK with the new CPN ?
 
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albagobragh

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It is too early too tell. She was all business but cracked a couple of jokes. When I said I had been researching 'my condition' and offered alternative explanations, she made a comment about me being a "Googler". She also appears to be pro-CTO and pro-medication, so I think I've got my work cut out convincing her otherwise.
 
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Zoe1

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I think if you have harmed yourself
and got on a CTO
then all mental health staff will be pro CTO and pro medication
its not even their decision
which is decided by a committee

I was told that there might be a chance of coming off my meds in the future
if I'm very co-operative with them

but now I dont feel like coming off it actually
I can see how it benefits me
 
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albagobragh

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The thing is, I haven't harmed myself or anyone else. I've been close to confronting someone who I feel was involved in my difficulties and prior to being sectioned (section 3) the last time in hospital I did say I would harm myself if forced to take medication, but I did neither.

I was in hospital for 9 weeks and discharged onto a CTO, this was in December 2018. I appealed it via tribunal but failed in my appeal. There are three criteria that must be satisfied - no harm to self, no harm to others and health grounds. The appeal failed because they thought it would be detrimental to my health if I stopped taking medication, which I said I would if I came off the CTO. The CTO lasts upto 6 months therefore in June my Community Psychiatrist applied to extend it for another 6 months. Basically, she and my CPN thought it should be extended. I had to see a Secondary Opinion Doctor and also an Approved Mental Health Professional who both ratified it. I also had a Hospital Manager's meeting who approved it also.

The CTO is up again for renewal in December, the next time it will last for a year.

The thing is, I'm on a CTO, through which I'm coerced into taking an Aripiprazole depot monthly and I don't feel I have a mental illness. Truth be told I feel a bit of a fraud conversing with people with real difficulties on this forum, but I'm here to learn and help.

Thanks for listening Zoe1. If you feel the meds are beneficial to you then there is no need to come of them in my view. Also, how do you get on with your CPN, if you have one?
 
fazza

fazza

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Hi can I ask a question.?

If you were to come off your cto would you continue with your medication?
 
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albagobragh

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Hi fazza, I'd keep taking it until my daughter's GCSEs were complete then I'd come off it.
 
fazza

fazza

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Hi fazza, I'd keep taking it until my daughter's GCSEs were complete then I'd come off it.
Ok thanks for the answer.
Gotta ask though why until your daughters GCSE's?
 
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albagobragh

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Ok thanks for the answer.
Gotta ask though why until your daughters GCSE's?
I wouldn't want to ruin things for her if I got for example rebound psychosis. Each time I've came off medication before I've either had to go back on it or have ended up back in hospital.
 
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Zoe1

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they think it would be bad for your health
if you came off the medication

in what way ?

currently I have an OT instead of a CPN
they said thats because of what they have available

I like him he is cheerful which cheers me up
but we end up chatting about how great things are
when sometimes they are not really !

I do want to continue seeing him
he comes round once a month
 
fazza

fazza

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I wouldn't want to ruin things for her if I got for example rebound psychosis. Each time I've came off medication before I've either had to go back on it or have ended up back in hospital.
Ah I see. Am i right in thinking you do not have psychiatric problem but will just suffer from rebound psychosis if you come off meds. If this is true why do you think they put you on antipsychotic medication in the first place? Is your rebound psychosis similar to your original problem?

I am so so sorry for all of the questions I am trying to find an angle of how to explain something.
 
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