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Crippling anxiety

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Row85

Member
Joined
Nov 3, 2020
Messages
23
Location
Kuwait
Oh yes I have Diazepam, which I think is the same thing. I try not to take it too often. I also have beta blockers for extreme anxiety. My beside drawer is like a small pharmacy!
Yes Diazepam is Valium. I know you don’t want to take too much of it, but sometimes when I’m extremely low I’ll take Xanax everyday for maybe 4-5 days, just to give my Brain a rest from the anxiety.
Since you’ve got all your meds, now you need to push yourself. It’s so hard, I know, trust me. I’ve spent a month in bed and my poor husband had to take care of the kids and work. I eventually had to push myslef to get up and get out of the house. You need to find somthing that makes you happy and do it. Keep pushing! It’s just a horrible period that will pass. X
 
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Cyclist

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
Wow thanks again for taking the time and trouble to reply. In fact although my wife and I are getting up later and later as winter advances we do go out, today we drove 24 miles to get my new prescription and look for mouse traps for the cars, which are being attacked by mice under the bonnets. When the rain stops we are straight out for walks.

The problem is the mind-numbing boredom of being stuck in this dirty mouse-infested bungalow.

Once our possessions are out of storage and delivered to the new house we will have some books to read.

The longer-term prospects are not great though as I have come to dislike this place and the house we are building, I won't bore you with the details. So I don't expect the stress to diminish after we've moved in.
 
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Row85

Member
Joined
Nov 3, 2020
Messages
23
Location
Kuwait
Wow thanks again for taking the time and trouble to reply. In fact although my wife and I are getting up later and later as winter advances we do go out, today we drove 24 miles to get my new prescription and look for mouse traps for the cars, which are being attacked by mice under the bonnets. When the rain stops we are straight out for walks.

The problem is the mind-numbing boredom of being stuck in this dirty mouse-infested bungalow.

Once our possessions are out of storage and delivered to the new house we will have some books to read.

The longer-term prospects are not great though as I have come to dislike this place and the house we are building, I won't bore you with the details. So I don't expect the stress to diminish after we've moved in.
Oh it’s no trouble to reply. It’s nice to have someone/people to talk to when you’re feeling low. It’s great your getting your possessions soon. Yes a good book might help your mind escape the stress.
I wouldn’t write off the house and place just yet. I’d wait till you settle in, then you’ll truly know how you feel. Also, nothing is set in stone, if you end up hating the place you can always sell up and move. But try to stay positive for now .
 
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Cyclist

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
Thank you for your wise and calming words. You've obviously been there and got the T shirt!
 
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Debaura500

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Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
202
Location
London
You need to take the diazepam and try doing something physical when you are chilled out
 
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Cyclist

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
Walking is all we have. My bike is here but I've completely lost my mojo for cycling in the cold and wet. Mostly because there's nowhere here to clean and service the bike after riding.
 
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Debaura500

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Nov 10, 2020
Messages
202
Location
London
You need to take the pills prescribed for your anxiety and do this everyday until you feel more like your old self. I know you dont like taking them but what is the alternative. You sound very depressed and a trio to the Dr or even a phone consultation where you explain everything you are feeling. I'd take the valium it'll calm you down so you do not have so much distress.
 
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Cyclist

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Joined
Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
You need to take the pills prescribed for your anxiety and do this everyday until you feel more like your old self. I know you dont like taking them but what is the alternative. You sound very depressed and a trio to the Dr or even a phone consultation where you explain everything you are feeling. I'd take the valium it'll calm you down so you do not have so much distress.
Well the Mirtazapine has had the effect of smoothing out my mood. I can't do much about the anxiety as there are so many factors out of our control here. I am in regular touch with my very good GP.

My therapist agrees that I have a mixture of stress, anxiety, depression, homesickness, insomnia and a touch of paranoia all feeding off each other.

We are living very perilously with little margin for safety, two weeks ago I had an accident and crashed through a glass panel that wasn't toughened and narrowly escaped serious injury. Our car has been damaged by mice but we really need it to be reliable living in the middle of nowhere. The roof leaks and if water starts to come in the place might become uninhabitable, but we've nowhere to go.
 
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Debaura500

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Messages
202
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I know the situation you are in. Why do you think the drs prescribed valium ?do you not have trust in their ability to help you ? It cannot take your problems away but makes you better equipped to deal with stressors you have
 
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Cyclist

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Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
Thanks, I do have the Diazepam as a sticking plaster for the bad days. Mirtazapine seems to suit me as it helps with the depression with minimal side-effects.
 
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Cyclist

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Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
@Row85 on re-reading this thread it suddenly strikes me that I completely hijacked the thread you started! I'm soooo sorry, I am so tied up in my own misery that I forgot that there are others suffering the same or worse. If you feel like it, please tell us about your own dark place and I for one, will see if I can offer any words of wisdom.
 
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Row85

Member
Joined
Nov 3, 2020
Messages
23
Location
Kuwait
@Row85 on re-reading this thread it suddenly strikes me that I completely hijacked the thread you started! I'm soooo sorry, I am so tied up in my own misery that I forgot that there are others suffering the same or worse. If you feel like it, please tell us about your own dark place and I for one, will see if I can offer any words of wisdom.
Oh don’t worry about it. When I started this thread I was so desperate. I’m feeling slightly better now. That’s what I love about this forum, people can share their stories and how they are feeling. We understand how the other person is feeling. X
 
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Cyclist

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Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
Thanks fellow insomniac. I take it you're in the UK?
 
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Row85

Member
Joined
Nov 3, 2020
Messages
23
Location
Kuwait
Thanks fellow insomniac. I take it you're in the UK?
Well I am half British and half Kuwaiti. I’m currently living in Kuwait. Haven’t see my family in the UK since last year due to covid, it’s been very hard. I bet you didn’t think you were speaking to someone all the way out here. Just goes to show that people feel the same all over the world.
 
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Cyclist

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Joined
Oct 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
Scotland
Well I'm glad you're feeling better.
Last night my wife admitted we have made a catastrophic error. I can't begin to tell you how bad it is in terms of the financial cost because you probably wouldn't believe anybody could be so imprudent with so much money.

The mental breakdown I'm suffering is so deep that I'm half hoping something dramatic will happen to give me a route out of the horror. It has messed up my brain so much I doubt I'll ever recover especially as the situation is set to become far far worse before it gets better. Everything about the new build is wrong, there isn't anything positive I can say about it. We have thrown away comfort, security and financial security, which is why I fear for the worst. I actually can't believe I will make it without suffering a major event such as a stroke or heart attack or dementia. I'm 64 and an ageing body can only take so much. The physical stress of moving will be immense as well so I'm expecting to injure a major muscle group lifting or pulling something. I really do feel I'm heading for disaster.
 
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