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Crappy Internet motivates loner to somehow try to at least make some new online friends.

I

Intareseid

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Joined
Nov 7, 2020
Messages
187
Location
.
Yeah, that's some tittle... But at least it's fairly descriptive.

I'm not really looking for answers here I guess, I think I'm just speaking (writing?) out loud exactly because, well, I lack any friends to discuss this with.

So my life is just a mess, I recently decided to move from my current home to try and find perhaps an environment that at least hurts my mental health less. Now the really stupid issue is that when you don't have a lot going on in life (or at all really) well you usually have to fill that void with something and in my case that something was the Internet.

Now to be honest I've never really enjoyed much of what I did with it, you play some games to pass time and create some illusion of progress, stream/download a bunch of media that I half heartedly watch. Still, when that's the only thing you have in life you sort of end up associating your own welfare with it.

So now to the point, I knew I would have to sacrifice some Internet quality with the move but I realized that due to some unforeseen shenanigans it won't be just some quality but more like a backwards leap in tech time of about a decade or more. Sufficient to say I felt rather down immediately. Again, when you have nothing much else in life...

So it got me thinking, I really need to have something more in life because at this point it's becoming difficult to even call this living. Sadly, there's not much for me in the real world as things stand, I'm kind of like an immigrant on the nation I was born in, just a complete outsider when it comes to cultural values.

But in the past somehow I had managed to make some actual good friends through the Internet, people with whom I could talk for hours and just be entertained, not feel as alone and at times even be there for them, offer advice, be useful in a way, imagine that.

That came with the issue that it often took me 3-4 years to come across a single person I could match with. And that was at a time when, well, I was a better person, more interesting, had some passion left.

It's so difficult because most people just feel so alien to me, so different, I don't know how to reach out an in any case I feel there's nothing interesting about them either.

But maybe that's a bit of distorted thought? maybe, maybe not. But with a life so hollow, I think I'm just going to have to try anyway. If I keep waiting for another once in half a decade chance encounter, well that's a lot of wasted time.

So I guess I just needed to write this, that even with the anxiety, depression and all the ifs and buts that come to mind, I just have to try, just a wide blitz to try and find some people to help fill life even a little bit.

*Note to self, rambling a whole lot less may help in this task.
 
U

Uther

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 28, 2020
Messages
74
Location
Earth
Hey man, welcome! I'm new to this site too.. I'm socially isolated - or as I prefer to say - I've "backed myself into a corner" due to anxiety and depression. I have no friends although I think it's my doing, as I seem to not be able to connect with people socially.
Anyways, you can always pm me if you'd like to chat. I may not answer straight away, but I'll always answer 👍
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
6,084
Location
Canada
I spend just about all my time alone these days, and I'm mostly OK with it, though it isn't much of a life. Except for going for a walk, buying a few things, and cooking or getting a cup of tea, I'm in my room all the time. I'm on the computer most of the time, also do some reading and puzzles. I live with two brothers. One keeps to himself and we rarely speak at all. The other I used to hang with watching TV, now just have a few words with now and then and that's enough for me. Guess I lost interest in his company as I find him a bit weird. I dwell on the past a lot, obsess over some things that are ancient history. I'm not ill but I haven't worked in years. I'd like to go back overseas. I used to be a teacher. It's been a strange life.

Anyway, guess all that is just a way of saying you're not the only one who doesn't feel a close connection with anybody..
 
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