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Counselling

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Wintergirl

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Jan 1, 2022
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105
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UK
I was told yesterday that the next appointment will be the last counselling appointment.

What can really be achieved in only six appointments? That’s still getting to know you time, and getting used to the therapist.
 
Contramike

Contramike

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Jan 27, 2010
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552
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Colorado
That's not enough time for anything! There isn't a lot you can accomplish in 6 sessions.

Is this normal in the UK? Are you granted X many visits by your therapist and then you're done?
 
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Wintergirl

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105
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UK
That's not enough time for anything! There isn't a lot you can accomplish in 6 sessions.

Is this normal in the UK? Are you granted X many visits by your therapist and then you're done?
It seems that way! I enquired with my GP about counselling, and they said it’s six appointments. This current one is through work so paid for by my employer, and they also say it’s only six. I guess to actually get anywhere you have to pay privately, which I can’t afford.
 
Contramike

Contramike

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Jan 27, 2010
Messages
552
Location
Colorado
It seems that way! I enquired with my GP about counselling, and they said it’s six appointments. This current one is through work so paid for by my employer, and they also say it’s only six. I guess to actually get anywhere you have to pay privately, which I can’t afford.
That's terrible!

Could you ask your counselor if there is a way to see someone indefinitely on a weekly basis? They would know more than your about it than your GP.
 
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Wintergirl

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UK
That's terrible!

Could you ask your counselor if there is a way to see someone indefinitely on a weekly basis? They would know more than your about it than your GP.
I asked her when she said it’s the last one. She said no, and that if I find I need support ‘after a few months’ to start the referral process again and get six more appointments.

I only told her at appointment four about being the one to find my mum’s body when she passed away unexpectedly, and she didn’t really delve into that and that’s got to be part of why I’ve now been diagnosed with depression. And at appointment five yesterday she brought up the guy who hurt me (he’s scared of relationships and keeps blocking/dumping me) when I wasn’t feeling strong enough to handle it. Six appointments only feels like picking at wounds and leaving them open
 
Contramike

Contramike

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Messages
552
Location
Colorado
I asked her when she said it’s the last one. She said no, and that if I find I need support ‘after a few months’ to start the referral process again and get six more appointments.

I only told her at appointment four about being the one to find my mum’s body when she passed away unexpectedly, and she didn’t really delve into that and that’s got to be part of why I’ve now been diagnosed with depression. And at appointment five yesterday she brought up the guy who hurt me (he’s scared of relationships and keeps blocking/dumping me) when I wasn’t feeling strong enough to handle it. Six appointments only feels like picking at wounds and leaving them open
That's awful! Counseling is helpful almost always in long term relationships with your counselor. That's the way it was designed. I hate seeing this happen to you!

I don't really know the system over there very well, but someone should chime in soon.

What you went through was very traumatic! I can't imagine going through that! That would definitely cause you to feel depressed, at least!

I wish I could help you more, but all I can really do is listen and offer words and advice.
 
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Wintergirl

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105
Location
UK
That's awful! Counseling is helpful almost always in long term relationships with your counselor. That's the way it was designed. I hate seeing this happen to you!

I don't really know the system over there very well, but someone should chime in soon.

What you went through was very traumatic! I can't imagine going through that! That would definitely cause you to feel depressed, at least!

I wish I could help you more, but all I can really do is listen and offer words and advice.
Thank you. I don’t think anyone can advise really, as it seems six appointments only is the norm. A girl I work with has been in a similar place, and she kept re-referring herself, but they said there has to be a certain amount of months between the block of six sessions and every single time she had a different therapist and had to go through the getting to know you period again every time.

I feel like a completely different person since it happened - I used to reply to messages straight away, now it can take months before anyone gets a response from me. Other than work, I don't go out or see anyone socially. I used to work in an industry where I organised events, but now the thought of planning and meeting up with people fills me with anxiety. I’m not happy in my work, or my life and I struggle to work out the changes I need to make. Talking to this counsellor once every two or three weeks has felt like calling the relative you only speak to at Christmas - just giving brief updates on everything, and then updating again the following year. No support with all the in between. Then the guy I like is scared of relationships so I lose the only support network I did have frequently. It’s tough.
 
stevie_sloth

stevie_sloth

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Mar 31, 2015
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2,951
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Australia
In Australia it's very similar. It's called a Mental Health Care Plan, and you used to get 10 sessions in a year. You had to go to the dr, get a referral for 6 sessions, and once they were used up, you then you had to go back to the dr and get another referral for the remaining 4 sessions.

Nowadays, it's 20 sessions, so that's an improvement. The problem is, these sessions are still not free. They're just not AS expensive. Instead of paying between $130 - $200 per session, you pay between $80 - $150.
 
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Wintergirl

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
105
Location
UK
In Australia it's very similar. It's called a Mental Health Care Plan, and you used to get 10 sessions in a year. You had to go to the dr, get a referral for 6 sessions, and once they were used up, you then you had to go back to the dr and get another referral for the remaining 4 sessions.

Nowadays, it's 20 sessions, so that's an improvement. The problem is, these sessions are still not free. They're just not AS expensive. Instead of paying between $130 - $200 per session, you pay between $80 - $150.
That sounds a little better to get 20 sessions, but I guess it depends on the specific issues as to whether that would be enough for the individual, and whether it would be starting from the beginning, like here! If I paid privately I could have as many as I like for as long as I like - but I don’t have that kind of disposable income.

It’s unlikely I will take them up on another six sessions in a few months, I guess I won’t be seeking support with these issues in future.
 
D

Dazed & Confused

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Australia
I call this kind of counselling 'drive thru counselling'. For me I need months to get to know a therapist and to build trust.

And there are so many fuckwits out there who call themselves therapists. It can take months to find someone.

A therapeutic relationship, and healing, isn't possible under these circumstances. And it is inadequate for a person who has a severe, life long mental illness.

I think this kind of counselling is suitable for people who don't have a mental illness but are experiencing normal life situations like losing a job or a loved one, but that is all.
 
Contramike

Contramike

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Joined
Jan 27, 2010
Messages
552
Location
Colorado
I call this kind of counselling 'drive thru counselling'. For me I need months to get to know a therapist and to build trust.

And there are so many fuckwits out there who call themselves therapists. It can take months to find someone.

A therapeutic relationship, and healing, isn't possible under these circumstances. And it is inadequate for a person who has a severe, life long mental illness.

I think this kind of counselling is suitable for people who don't have a mental illness but are experiencing normal life situations like losing a job or a loved one, but that is all.
In America we have "life coaches." They are people who want to be therapists but don't want to go through all that college. They're basically motivators who will get you organized and make a plan for your near-term future. I can see a need for that in some cases on this forum. Most others would benefit more from professional counseling.
 
Contramike

Contramike

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Jan 27, 2010
Messages
552
Location
Colorado
My therapist lives in another state, so I can't book her through insurance. She was my therapist before I moved. I see her once a week over the net for $70, which is dirt cheap here.
 
W

Wintergirl

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
105
Location
UK
I call this kind of counselling 'drive thru counselling'. For me I need months to get to know a therapist and to build trust.

And there are so many fuckwits out there who call themselves therapists. It can take months to find someone.

A therapeutic relationship, and healing, isn't possible under these circumstances. And it is inadequate for a person who has a severe, life long mental illness.

I think this kind of counselling is suitable for people who don't have a mental illness but are experiencing normal life situations like losing a job or a loved one, but that is all.
Six sessions doesn’t feel enough at all after losing a loved one. I woke up one morning to find my only parent unresponsive and unsuccessfully performed CPR on her, and then had to fight to stay in my home. I was hoping for support dealing with it all as I went straight back to work, working six days a week and haven’t processed the death at all
 
Contramike

Contramike

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2010
Messages
552
Location
Colorado
Six sessions doesn’t feel enough at all after losing a loved one. I woke up one morning to find my only parent unresponsive and unsuccessfully performed CPR on her, and then had to fight to stay in my home. I was hoping for support dealing with it all as I went straight back to work, working six days a week and haven’t processed the death at all
That's just awful! What a terrible system!

You must be exhausted! Going to work six days a week will bearing the weight of that experience is unthinkable! Can your work at least give you some time off considering? I don't know if that would help, but maybe they can do something?

You don't deserve this!
 
W

Wintergirl

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
105
Location
UK
That's just awful! What a terrible system!

You must be exhausted! Going to work six days a week will bearing the weight of that experience is unthinkable! Can your work at least give you some time off considering? I don't know if that would help, but maybe they can do something?

You don't deserve this!
They made me work my days off for three months, even though I said I have appointments, so I missed everything from October to December! They are not understanding at all. I’ve already dropped one day to work five, I’m considering dropping to only four, but I’m not sure it would be a good decision financially. But I’m not living my life. I’m struggling with indecision and I was hoping counselling would help with that. I don’t know what to do, I just know that things aren’t okay as they are
 
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