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couldn't face appointment

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donny

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Jul 20, 2010
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I was due to see my counsellor today for the first time but I couldnt face going. Im not sure I am ready to talk about my feelings and what is going on in my head.

any advice would be appreciated
 
Boris

Boris

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The first time is always the worst... I`m not a counsellor myself, but if I was I think I would put you at ease first by telling you about myself, the obstacles I`ve faced in life etc and then progress from there. Counselling can be a very good thing, just don`t raise your expectations on the first meeting, remember you only have to talk about what you want to talk about, and evaluate the meeting(s) afterwards. I think you should make another appointment. You can be honest and say you were too anxious about the meeting, apologise, and promise to turn up for the next one, or failing that make up some excuse, or get someone else to ring for you. Go to the next meeting, and let us know how you get on :)
 
KP1

KP1

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I supposed it really depends on what you want. If you want to use counselling to try and move forward then ring up and try and book another appointment. They do know it can take a long time to open up it took me months with my thyerapist to learn to trust her enough.
Good luck
KP
 
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distraction

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May 24, 2010
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you only have to speak about what you are comfortable with and open up more as and when it feels right.
most first appts are for assesment only to see if they can help and they really only want a brief overview of
your background and this will give you a chance to see if you feel comfortable in your surroundings.
the things that are stopping you going are the reason you need to go at least give it a try and please let me know how you got on
 
G

grahamm

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Aug 6, 2010
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Hi Donny, I think the counsellor will be aware this is often a problem. They may have seen 100s of people like your self. I have never done therapy but I see a psychiatrist 4 or 5 times a year and should tell him anything relavent. There are some things to embarassing, humiliating and that I am ashamed off that I dont tell him. I dont think you need to tell them everything. Maybe discuss boundaries with your counsellor, if youre asked a question you find awkward ask if you can think it over and give a reply next time. As threatment progresses it might get easier.
 
S

suzy

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Jun 26, 2009
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you should have gone, go to the next one :)
 
trombone_babe

trombone_babe

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I agree with what others have said, try and make another appointment if you don't already have one. Say you were too anxious to attend the last one, they will understand. Most counsellors are pretty good at putting people at ease so once you get over that first hurdle hopefully you will be OK.

Let us know how you get on.
 
Mayfair

Mayfair

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I was due to see my counsellor today for the first time but I couldnt face going. Im not sure I am ready to talk about my feelings and what is going on in my head.

any advice would be appreciated
I've not read any other responses so forgive me if I'm copying someone else.

Personally I couldn't talk with a C, as I think I know better.

I've almost made the decision to look for help. But it could only be in written form as I also don't like talking. So, I'm trying to write several bullet points (lots actually as its turning out, hehe).. with a view to answering questions based on these. That way, I feel in control. Perhaps this could be an idea for you?

I hope you find the answer that you are looking for,

ash :)
 
G

grahamm

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Mayfair are you always like that? I would imagine that approach is not going to be fruitful and indeed is a symptom of what is wrong with you. Sorry if you take offense.
 
Mayfair

Mayfair

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Mayfair are you always like that? I would imagine that approach is not going to be fruitful and indeed is a symptom of what is wrong with you. Sorry if you take offense.
I rarely take offense to anything :)

If you could see someone 'there and then', as it were, then I could talk to someone perhaps. However, it just doesn't work that way.

I'll be sat at home thinking and talking out in my head what I would say to someone, then the appointment is weeks later ... by then, I've forgotten the important details, and most importantly, if I'm well and happy, I don't want to ruin it by talking about bad times.

Perhaps you are right that that is part of the problem. I don't dismiss any suggestions Grahamm. I'll add that to my notes. :)
 
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Allyke

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Jun 2, 2010
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I almost backed out of my first appointment too, but when I went it was actually ok. There was no pressure and it was based on what I felt needed to be said. Your counsellor will understand why you missed your appointment, counselling is really difficult to start with, I found, but it soon feels much easier. Hope you're ok xx
 
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