- Aug 3, 2019
So since I've been a late teenager I have been a bit of a hypochondriac. I've had heart tests done with cardiologists because I thought I had a heart problem. I've had in depth stomach tests done because I thought I had a serious stomach condition. And the worst of all and most recent one was I fully convinced myself that I had a terminal brain tumor all because I was having minor tension headaches that wouldn't go away, I literally researched these for days and knew all the symptoms and eventually started convincing myself that I had "swelling in my eyes, bad balance, small twitches in my body and all this ended up convincing myself my life was over and I would die. I would cry in the shower for hours. Well the CT scan came back completely normal. However, since that "incident" I've noticed I have been carrying some extra anxiety with me for the last 6 months or so. And now it seems like my next hypochondriac fixation is that I have some sort of mental illness like depression, panic disorder, brain chemical imbalance issue. I've already posted a few times on this board asking for advice on how I can increase serotonin/dopamine, how I can make myself feel happier, etc. But maybe this whole time I've been making up anxiety/mental health symptoms like I always do in the past??? I remember from the brain tumor experience I was 100% sold that the symptoms were real and it was not in my head. Just acknowledging this and writing about it already is making me feel better. Anybody have any experience or thoughts on this? I just want to be free from these shitty feelings and move on with my life. Thanks!