Confusing psychotic experience

M

Muco

New member
Joined
May 30, 2019
Messages
2
Location
Norway
#1
Hello. I have had an ongoing thought that my life isn't actually real. Whether it's a dream I'm going to wake up from, or I am actually just dead without knowing. Either way, I've been waiting to wake up/move on ever since I became more certain that my theory was correct.

Yesterday I had a strange experience related to this. I was on my phone, and suddenly I saw something like a message or signal on my phone, telling me that it was time for me to die/fade away. I don't remember what I saw, but I remember that it came from my phone out of the blue. I was sure that it was the clear signal I needed to move on.

I laid down and closed my eyes, and I could feel myself fading away and my energy draining from my body. Kind of like when your limbs become numb. Suddenly the process stopped and I regained complete awareness of my surroundings again. Now I am mostly just confused and worried.

Has anyone else experienced something like this? I don't know if I'm just not ready to fade away or if my brain truly is playing a trick on me.
 
Chopsy

Chopsy

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Joined
Jun 10, 2016
Messages
1,900
Location
UK
#2
Hi Muco,

i have had similar types of 'death / being 'dead' / 'it's time to go' themes during mania and psychosis.

It can be very confusing and worrisome :hug1:

i found that if i could 'ground' myself then these types of experiences were easier to manage and get through. Often being physically around other people would help me to become more grounded, feel safer and help me to gain some clarity.
 
burt tomato

burt tomato

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Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,625
Location
Mordor
#3
Yes I have had this a few times. First notably was my first ever episode back in 1998??

I had one recently this spring when I was stoned. Thought I was going to die, it was a very similar feeling, like repressed psychosis coming out.
 

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