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Confused

J

JGT

New member
Joined
Dec 7, 2009
Messages
2
Hello Everyone

not really sure where to start. Don't really know what to say? So I'll just blurt out how I'm feeling and hopefully somebody can relate to what I say.*

I'm wondering if I have some kind of OCD or depression. I'm really struggling to get motivated lately and everything seems too much effort. People normally see me as being quite driven but for the last six months or so all I want to do is hide myself away and collapse on the sofa.*

Things that have happened to me? Well relationship isn't too great. We've had problems do to my girlfiend getting onto trouble financially. I feel everything rests on my shoulders since she can't / won't change. We can't see eye to eye on many things and we argue too much. We don't appreciate each other etc........
We've spoken about splitting up which I don't want to happen but I feel myself wanting more from the relationship. *

Work is difficult. I'm half self employed and the company I worked at went bankrupt 7 months ago. Since then I work from home and just can't get motivated. I lie around ignoring what work I could be doing to earn decent money.*

Thinking about little jobs that need a little effort just stresses me out. I want to forget about everything and pretend they're not there. This causes stress eventually. *

I just feel flat and unhappy. My girlfiend has started to criticize me for being lazy. She's not interested in how i feel because I'm the "strong one" and I shouldn't be acting like this.*

About my personality.*

I always worry about people I care about. Too much really. I worry that my girlfriend has to travel so much on busy roads. I worry that she might have an accident.*

I worry when she goes out at night with friends especially if she stays away from home. I can't rest intil I know she is safe. She was attacked when she was younger which may affect the way i feel about this. *

If something worries me than I cannot focus on anything, like work, until I feel that everything will be ok. I become tunnel visioned. *

I worry that bad things are going to happen and this makes me feel more depressed.*

I seem to do things over the top often. If go out with friends I will always drink more than I should and always act like a different person which I feel bad about the next day. I don't do anything wrong but I become more extroverted to the point that I feel embarrassed.*

Normally I would shake all this off and I know there are people with bigger problems than this. So I apologise if I sound sorry for myself. Buy I feel like I need to talk about this.*

I normally keep everything bottled up.*

There is lots I could say buy that's it for now.*

Any magic beans out there?
 
unlucky

unlucky

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Mar 21, 2009
Messages
2,858
Location
Glasgow
Hello JGT and :welcome: to the forum, hopefully there will be people here who can help you with what you're going through.
I'm afraid there are no magic beans, but if you find the formula for them I think you could make a fortune!!! Is there anyone you can speak to about this, I understand if you and your partner aren't getting along so well this may not be possible with her but is there a close friend you could maybe speak to. I also think you should go and see you GP to see what he has to say about this. Unfortunately noone on here can offer any kind of diagnosis but hopefully we can be a friendly ear to listen. Take care.
 
K

kb2

New member
Joined
Jan 7, 2010
Messages
4
Hi,

Sounds like your going through a really tought time, and i can relate to this.

I too went throught the same thing a few years ago, and i got through it.

Im not expert but it seems to me like a lot of the things you are going through are based on the things that are happening in your life right now. Maybe you think you have no control over them so you have just given up, but try not to let things get on top of you.

I know it may seem really hard, but start with your problems from the begining and work you way through them.

Why not sit down and talk to your partner about the situation you two are in. Tell her your feelings about her financial situation, how it makes you feel, how she feels and what you think you both could do to ease things. Try doing more things together like going out, for one it might make your relationship become stronger and also getting out and doing something might take your mind off the way you've been feeling lately. Even take time out from the relationship to spend more time with friends/family, time apart might make you appreciate each other more.

As for work, i suppose its the last thing we want to do when we are feeling this way. I gave up work completely when i was going through the same thing, and i can tell you now i really wish i hadnt of. I did feel as if everything was getting on top of me, as you do, but now i've come through the other side i realised that getting back out into work and being busy and around other people would of been one of the first things that helped me.

I have a son and because he makes me so happy (and takes up most of my time!) i find i have no time to think about things which may make me feel down. Why dont you invest alot of time into somethin you are equally as passionate about??

There are also alot of people out there who are willing to listen, why not try counselling?? There are loads of free services, and dont feel afraid about going it really helps to talk.

If after all this you still feel the same way, go see your doctor. The deal with this sort of this all the time. They will be able to decide on the best form or treatmeat for you whether it be counselling or medication. Who knows maybe this could be a short term thing and with a little help, you'll be back to your old self in no time!!

Hope this helps a bit!
 
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