Confused newbie

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Sinskip77

New member
Joined
Nov 28, 2018
Messages
4
#1
Very new to all this and don't have clue whats going on 😟 Hubby had some form of breakdown September spent week in crisis house, medication was working and then I lost my dad. Hubbie has relapsed and I can't support him, I'm a mess not accepted dads dead, angry at him for not stepping up or supporting me,had no time to come to terms with what is going on in my life. I threatened him on Friday and he has been at parents ever since(my choice) . His now asking to come back on Friday, what do i do? We have a toddler and I can't afford to put myself or our child in that position, I've started counselling today to try and get to terms with my feelings / emotions.
 
Z

ziedite

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2013
Messages
255
Location
UK
#2
Oh you poor thing... first of all welcome to the forum. It's a safe place to post most anything btw.

Firstly, your situation would throw most if not all of us, so don't think its just you. I assume hubby's breakdown wasn't foreseen, and that has completely moved your life out of whack. If you can somehow separate that from your own grief losing your dad, that might help. He needs his own help right now and you may have to get some emotional support from others in your life - other family or friends perhaps helping you process your dad's passing. Which do not underestimate the importance and impact that will have on you. Depending on hubby's emotional and mental state, he may be able to offer some support, but if he is struggling too, it may not be dependable. You may want to contact a bereavement charity, many of them have hotlines, which you can use just to cry and vent, when no one else is around.

As for having him back home...that's a tough one. Only you can answer that, but you probably want to ensure that he has put in place some therapy or meds to manage is own issues. You are not in a good position to support him as you yourself need supporting. So if you can, reach out to others in your circle to help you and you child out, and let us know how we can support you here. Take good care of yourself.