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Compulsive Lying and Depression

G

Gee :)

Member
Joined
Mar 19, 2015
Messages
6
Hi I am really struggling mentally, I am 19 and have been lying compulsively since I was 11, I have recently told the biggest lie of my life that I had slept with a 40 year old man and had a miscarriage and my friends have just found out. I hate lying but I can't stop I have tried but at the moment it has taken over, because of this I think Im developing depression. I struggle with everyday life I get so stressed and snap into a violent rage, I don't know what to do :/ :(
 
calypso

calypso

Well-known member
Admin
Moderator
Joined
Jan 5, 2011
Messages
52,550
Location
Lancashire
Hiya Gee, :welcome: to the forum. I think we lie a lot when we don't believe in ourselves as valid people in our own right. Its a way of getting attention when we sometimes don't feel we are interesting enough or going to be valid enough.

I would suggest you try some counselling to get to the roots of this and work it through. Its not as uncommon as you might think, and its something which is quite destructive, as you have found out the hard way. But try asking what happened at 11, or what was the pattern of your family's interaction with you. A member of my family did this a lot, but eventually realised that she felt stupid in relation to her other siblings and various things had made her feel this. She also felt ignored by her parents and not validated as a person in her own right.

I wish you well and think you are brave to write this and come on here with it.
 
G

Gee :)

Member
Joined
Mar 19, 2015
Messages
6
Hiya Gee, :welcome: to the forum. I think we lie a lot when we don't believe in ourselves as valid people in our own right. Its a way of getting attention when we sometimes don't feel we are interesting enough or going to be valid enough.

I would suggest you try some counselling to get to the roots of this and work it through. Its not as uncommon as you might think, and its something which is quite destructive, as you have found out the hard way. But try asking what happened at 11, or what was the pattern of your family's interaction with you. A member of my family did this a lot, but eventually realised that she felt stupid in relation to her other siblings and various things had made her feel this. She also felt ignored by her parents and not validated as a person in her own right.

I wish you well and think you are brave to write this and come on here with it.
Hi Thank you, it took a lot of courage to write this, I had a rough childhood which is where it stems from. Its hard because don't see it as an illness and just think I am selfish, I may enquire about counselling because its been bottled up for years. Thank you once again :)
 
Hope Just Hope

Hope Just Hope

New member
Joined
Mar 20, 2015
Messages
3
Hello

It's a massive step that you have taken, like you had said 'it took a lot of courage' and an even bigger one to admit to yourself let alone others. And your doing it all right by admitting you are considering counselling. I wish you all the best :)
 
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