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Community Treatment Order and Aripiprazole depot injection ruining my life!

B

Bao Tran

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Community Treatment Order and Aripiprazole depot injection ruining my life!

Hello Everyone,

I am new to this forum. I am looking to make new friends who can help in my recovery, exchange experiences and build and share friendships :).

I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia in 2014. In my opinion, I was going through depression but now this diagnosis is affecting my life in a negative way. I am trying to get a private 2nd opinion about my diagnosis. I believe I went through troubling life experiences and trauma that caused me to react in such ways and started hearing voices that were calming and reassuring for me. I do not feel it is a mental illness.

Now I have been on a Community Treatment Order since 2014, this seems to be a ridiculously long time to be on one. I am being forced aripiprazole as an injection every month. I sleep my life away, gained 3 stone in weight, developed diabetes, have body stiffness and feet pain etc. The medication makes me so low yet all the NHS do is they worship these medications. The NHS team do not help me at all. I am fighting to get this Community Treatment Order lifted as I feel it is not helpful but preventing me from moving on in life. I want to have control over whether I can take meds or not.

I have been through hospital manager's hearings and tribunals but the psychiatrist's opinion is so strong. My mum does not speak English well and I lost many friends due to this diagnosis. I also got an advocate from Mind charity but she was useless and left her job so now I am searching for a new one. I want to move on with life yet the NHS team do not listen to me and help find a more holistic way of treatment. In desperation I have contacted Mind, Rethink, Sane, and the Samaritans for help. I have tried everything but still on the CTO.

Has anyone been though the same on here? Is there any way I can get help? Surely we must have some human rights! I want to move on and feel alive without being drugged up.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Hi,
I to am being forced into having aripiprazole injections. I don't believe I have schizophrenia either. I understand how you feel, many people are wrongly diagnosed. However it's hard to accept a mental health diagnosis.
Try getting a second opinion, I'm not on a CTO. Was sectioned into hospital, however it was all removed on my discharge.
Good luck and take care
 
B

Bao Tran

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Thank you Mayflower7. I was also sectioned in hospital. I am here if you'd ever like to share your experience. Doctors do not know enough about schizophrenia. Everybody needs a good support network. Take good care of yourself.
 
cpuusage

cpuusage

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Hi. i went through it all in the past. Some people escape from it all to various degrees.

Only suggestion that i can make is to play the Game & use reverse psychology. Tell them how unwell you have been, agree with them all about everything, & often they'll drop you.
 
cpuusage

cpuusage

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Hi. i went through it all in the past. Some people escape from it all to various degrees.

Only suggestion that i can make is to play the Game & use reverse psychology. Tell them how unwell you have been, agree with them all about everything, & often they'll drop you.
You can't directly fight/win against the system, they're holding all the cards. You have to get clever about it all if you want to be away from them. But zero contact with mental health services can also bring all it's own different set of problems as well.
 
cpuusage

cpuusage

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Only suggestion that i can make is to play the Game & use reverse psychology. Tell them how unwell you have been, agree with them all about everything, & often they'll drop you.
The truly mad are convinced that they're sane - the sane know they're mad. You can't be mad if you know you are - it's one of the lunatic things from some pseudo Freudian reverse psychological mumbo jumbo, but it does work surprisingly well. Will be harder to get off the depot, but No reason why you can't switch to pills if they think you're doing well & 'responding to treatment'.

Would be interested in the views of 'Rambo' & 'Harsh-Reality' on this thread & what they'd suggest with it all?
 
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Bao Tran

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Yes, I agree we have to try and play the game. But it is so tiring, I have been with the system since I was 31, now I am 38... almost a decade of this rubbish.
 
cpuusage

cpuusage

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Yes, I agree we have to try and play the game. But it is so tiring, I have been with the system since I was 31, now I am 38... almost a decade of this rubbish.
Yea it's crap. But the agreeing/complying with it all, even when you don't, does work as a strategy. You then have wondrous insight into your mental illness, which is a sign of wellness/recovery/progress.

i've had 26 years of it all off & on. It is very tiring. Everything is pretty much focused on pathology, labels & drugs. All we can do is try our best to accept that's the way it all is & create our own life/healing as best that we can. Sadly mental health services are often a gateway to the benefits & housing system, so if we don't have money/our own resources, or a job, it's another problem, & we're trying to deal with the effects of the treatments & all our own difficulties. Some people do choose willing homelessness with it all, or harder circumstances. The whole system is totally fucked & wrong, you won't have me disagree with you.

It's worth considering how much you may want to use the diagnosis/system to your advantage & what you can get out of it all, & i don't see anything wrong in doing all that. Play the Game/System as far as possible, fuck em, what have 'they'/any of it done to respond intelligently, compassionately, appropriately, kindly & in genuinely healing & supportive ways anyway?
 
B

Bao Tran

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I am sorry to hear you have had 26 years of it. Are you on any medication at the moment?
You are right the mental health system is a gateway to to the benefits and housing system....unfortunately because I get side effects of the meds, I can not work at the moment, therefore I can not fund myself privately.

It's true Fuck em! The meds make me worse so I should use the system to my advantage, we should. My team have not done very much for me. Like I said they just worship the drugs...Thank you Cpuusage!
 
cpuusage

cpuusage

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I am sorry to hear you have had 26 years of it. Are you on any medication at the moment?
You are right the mental health system is a gateway to to the benefits and housing system....unfortunately because I get side effects of the meds, I can not work at the moment, therefore I can not fund myself privately.

It's true Fuck em! The meds make me worse so I should use the system to my advantage, we should. My team have not done very much for me. Like I said they just worship the drugs...Thank you Cpuusage!
i conceded in the end to accepting the diagnosis (as a category), & a low dose of one medication 300mg Amisulpride, which i take religiously. The label is now a life long medical & social reality anyway. Have maintained the medication for the past 12 years & all things considered i feel it's a lesser of evils. i do feel that i could have been/could be far better helped, but there's now a lot of water under the bridge & a lot that has gone on. i think that things reach a stage where probably Not a lot more can be fundamentally resolved with it all anyway, at least Not very easily - the appropriate response is needed in the initial stages with it all.

i've Not been able to be more financially independent either, although i was in full time work off & on for 8 years in the past & completed 7 years of further education over the years.

We just have to try & make the best of it all. Some people are better than others in the system & there are some good people about, & it's Not so much individual people that i take issues with, it's the system/paradigm/treatment itself, it's wrong imo, have never really agreed with it all.
 
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wellwell

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Hello Bao Tran,

I really feel for you. I am in a similar situation as you at the moment the only difference is I refuse to play their game.
They are not interested in me as a person just trying their hardest to get me into hospital on false pretence and possibly section me and force medication on me. I believe in self help not being force fed lethal cocktails that have not been thoroughly tested.

If I knew that help would be available to me once I had been treated I would happily comply but seeing that people are drugged up and left to their own devices on many occasions I will avoid them like the plague.
I do not wish to be forced injected or drugged up on pills that have deadly side effects and made to take them for years by a pompous psychiatrist and mental health team that won't/don't have my interest at heart.
I do not want a label that will stick and cause damage to me long after they have walked away and left me to cope on my own while they go after the next victim.
I do not wish to balloon to a ridiculous size and have no one show any real concern to help me to lose the weight. For a country that goes on about obesity so much but has no interest in peoples concerns who are already suffering with mental health and have to struggle with serious weight gain and have their concerns ignored is a disgrace.
The mental health system is broken and a sham throughout the world and I am not about to be dragged into it and treated like I am nothing like others have been.

If ever you need someone to talk to I am here.
 
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seriouslydisturbed

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According to the solicitor I had in the hospital they cannot force you to take medication unless your sectioned, even on a community treatment order they can't force you. I'm in a bad situation also, I'm on injections, I have not come off as I already tried and I just went mad. Instead I'm aiming for a full recovery one day, years from now I'm hoping to taper off the medication. Have you asked about when they are going to try taking you off the drugs to see if a full recovery is possible for you? It's your right to have that goal and to try for it.
 
B

Bao Tran

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I have a friend who has accepted her diagnosis and takes her medication religiously. If you are ok with medication and don't get terrible side effects then as long as you are happy that is fine, but there is always something that can be done at this late stage. Another friend of mine has had her life almost ruined with 15 years of medication. She is now living without medication and feels better and is doing very well.

I'm sorry you have not been able to be financially independent. Life can be hard. I can not work currently, getting out of bed is hard for me. I don't want to sleep my life away.

Yes you are right, it's not individual people that I have issues with but I do not agree with the system either.

I wish you well and take care of yourself.
 
B

Bao Tran

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Hello wellwell,

Thank you for your message!
I wish I could not play the game like yourself... but they find ways to put me in hospital as well. Last year I stopped taking medication because I feel the diagnosis is wrong. When I stopped I felt a hell of a lot better... I was designing and making my bow ties, being creative again. My care coordinator found a way to recall me to hospital but I was not exhibiting psychotic symptoms or relapsing. It was only because she found out I stopped my medication. So you are right they don't care about us as people or our recovery. Self help is a good way to recover, yes.

You are right I have been drugged up and left alone, to my own devices. My looks have been ruined by these deadly drugs.

I want to ask them if this label is permanent? It is unfair.
I understand everything you are saying... I have ballooned to a size 12/14 and I am only 4ft 11. I used to be a size 8.

Thank you for being there to talk, I really appreciate it.
 
cpuusage

cpuusage

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I have a friend who has accepted her diagnosis and takes her medication religiously. If you are ok with medication and don't get terrible side effects then as long as you are happy that is fine, but there is always something that can be done at this late stage. Another friend of mine has had her life almost ruined with 15 years of medication. She is now living without medication and feels better and is doing very well.

I'm sorry you have not been able to be financially independent. Life can be hard. I can not work currently, getting out of bed is hard for me. I don't want to sleep my life away.

Yes you are right, it's not individual people that I have issues with but I do not agree with the system either.

I wish you well and take care of yourself.
Thanks. Glad that your friend is doing well.

i've just felt a bit hopeless in ways about certain things around it all. The lack of access to good & appropriate psychological help, the general negativity & attitudes to people with a schizophrenia diagnosis. i fought the system & after 7 major episodes i suppose a part of me just gave up. Have felt a lot of anger in the past around it all & the ways i've been treated.

i hate being on this medication, but however i tried to come off it in the past it would always end in very severe illness/psychosis. It's the same catch 22 with the whole thing - there hasn't been/isn't anything it seems to try & more fundamentally work through the underlying condition/experiences/difficulties to enable to fuller healing with it all.
 
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