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Coming face to face with an abuser from my childhood in new job.

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Fancyharm

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
533
Location
West Midlands
I have spent day two of my new job realising that I may more than likely come face to face with an abuser from my childhood.

I cannot describe how horrible the prospect feels right now.

I am battling anxiety and acid reflux as it is. I have done really well today, but finding that this person from my past will be entering my workplace is not good. I haven't seen this person for over 20 years.

I have also learned that this person lives near my workplace.

There has been an instance when the police wanted to arrest this person bit I said no because I was so frightened it would cause more trouble.
 
Poopy Doll

Poopy Doll

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2015
Messages
11,502
Location
Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA
Fancyharm, this must be so upsetting for you. Just remember, if you have to face this person, be assertive, stand up for yourself.
 
F

Fancyharm

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
533
Location
West Midlands
Thanks Poopy Doll.

It is upsetting. I didn't sleep much last night. I have still made sure that I have done everything I wanted to do today, I am not going to let the fact that I haven't slept because of the upset interrupt my day, which would make me feel worse.

I will just have to try and cope with it and like you said, stand up for myself. I just hope that the surprise of me being there doesn't send him into a rage. Then I don't know what I will do, but I know for a fact that if the police are called again and they want to arrest him, I will let them.
 
K

KG654

Active member
Joined
Oct 12, 2017
Messages
37
I can understand how that makes you anxious!

I have been there before. Is it a big company or small one? In a bigger one or bldg he is less likely to see you or recognize you in a crowd. In all honesty, he probably won't recognize you esp if your hair is different, whether it's color or cut. Abusers tend to be very self focused. However, if it is just too much, which is completely understandable, can you find new work? They say the best time to find work is while you are still working then you don't come across as desperate. If not, maybe let a co worker you trust know, so they will help keep eye out and walk w you. At least, don't walk alone if at all possible, just for peace if nothing else. does your place of work have cameras? That could be an added security. To calm your spirit, try taking magnesium and ginseng, they calm the mind body and spirit and get rid of sticky negative thoughts and worries. Hoping for the best for you, whatever it may be. <3
 
Jbb79

Jbb79

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Sep 15, 2018
Messages
337
Location
Aalestrup --Dk
It's Not your job, to make him happy, Just avoid him - - If he's grown up, he'll Probably regret His behavior - You Might get A fair Apology x x
 
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