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College Advice

C

CasualDay

New member
Joined
Mar 31, 2019
Messages
2
Location
FL
Hello.
I’m currently a high-school senior, and I’m leaving to college this August. It’s out of state. I’ll be going to VA while my family stays in FL. It was an easy decision, since I’m committed to my major, but I’m terrified of being completely and utterly alone.
I have an extremely hard time making friends. I want to talk to people, but I simply can’t. I’m fine with casual conversation with strangers, like at a customer service desk, but I find it extremely difficult with classmates and others my age. This has been the majority of my life.
I was emotionally and mentally abused by my father, and I left his house last August to live with my mother.
I used to see a psychologist for depression, but it was never diagnosed, I just took Sam-e from CVS or Walgreens.
When it comes to events I must attend, or being on stage, I simply freak out internally. I’m not the kind of person to hyperventilate out loud, but I do it internally, through my nose. A lot. I recently had to have dinner with my college’s dean and other out of state students and I was freaking out for a week beforehand. I even started spotting (and still am). I shook throughout the entire dinner and could barely talk to anyone; just awkwardly laughed at times I thought appropriate. I thought I would puke or my heart was going to eventually stop with how fast it went the entire time.
I avoid parties because of this, as well.
There’s some backstory information.
Now to the real thing:
Regarding college, everyone knows about dorming. Since I’m out of state, I have to stay in a dorm room. Freshmen are required to, anyway.
I’ve been dreading it ever since I learned this. I feel nauseas and feel myself start to hyperventilate everytime I dwell on it.
I asked the dean about single dorms - she said that they’re extremely rare, and are mostly reserved for disability students and RA’s. Afterwards, she said that if you’re a normal freshmen, you’re definitely sharing with a roommate.
I do not feel like I can survive this way, especially since I’m not around anybody I know. I can’t escape to my parents over the week like most of the students can.
I’m an only child, as well, and I’ve never been to sleepovers or sleep away camps.
Since she said single rooms are reserved for students with disabilities, could I qualify with a psychiatrist to claim one?
This is so I can feel comfortable in the year that I’m away from home. My parents may move up there for my second year.
Also, I do not comform to most practices people my age conform to. I’m opposed to alcohol, drugs, and casual sex. So, basically I’m opposed to college students.
I know I will have people tell me that everyone needs to go through it, and I need to deal with it, and experiment, whatever. Please do not tell me these things. I have heard them enough. I am simply trying to be as comfortable as I can be without damaging myself while I’m states away from my parents in a strange place/area around people I don’t fit in with.
So, could I qualify? Should I get an diagnosis, maybe medication to help?
Thank you.
 
C

CasualDay

New member
Joined
Mar 31, 2019
Messages
2
Location
FL
Also, I constantly feel self conscious and like I am being judged by most people for my “unusual” ways. I don’t want to live like that.
 
littlemachines

littlemachines

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 28, 2019
Messages
48
Location
USA
i remember feeling the same way when i started college. social interactions make me extremely nervous and i've always had a lot of trouble making friends. but if it's any consolation, i made some of my closest friends in college. i think it helps that starting out, no one knows each other so people are more likely to introduce themselves to you and friendships form from there. in my experience, i grew close with a few people who lived in my hallway; it's a very different environment from high school, since you're living in such close proximity with your peers and i think that helps you get used to their company. like you, i also was not much of a "partygoer", but i think you will find that not every college student fits that stereotype and there will be other likeminded students. personally i also lived in a substance-free hallway (no drugs/alcohol)...i don't know if that's an option at your school but it might be something to look into. i wish you the best of luck and hope it turns out well!
 
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