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Citalopram weight gain

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george81

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Hello everyone. I'm currently restricting my calorie intake and have started worrying about putting on weight since starting citalopram 6 weeks ago. I think I've put a tiny bit of weight on despite not changing the number of calories I'm taking in and am worrying about it, I'm considering lowering my daily calorie intake further to counteract this. I am feeling hungrier since starting citalopram and my stomach is grumbling a lot. This is bad and makes it harder to ignore. Has anyone else had any problem with weight gain on antidepressants? I previously put on nearly 4 stone when I was on fluoxetine before!!
 
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bpd2020

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george81, you restricting is the reason you are hungry. I understand you saying you want to be in control and you feel you do not deserve food but until that is addressed nothing can change. It must have been horrible to gain weight when you were on fluoxetine and maybe that is the reason you are so strict with your food now.
 
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george81

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Thank you for your kind reply. I have been restricting for over a year now and have only just been put on citalopram, I wasn't on any antidepressant for around 4 years prior to this. I had gotten used to the hunger and could manage it before the citalopram, it's making me feel very hungry now and I'm very anxious about putting on weight as I weight myself every morning and it's slowly creeping up. I haven't actually seen my doctor in person for 4 years and was started on citalopram after a telephone consultation. I didn't tell the doctor about my weight loss so they aren't aware. I hear loud voices telling me I'm a stupid, ugly fat bitch when I'm looking at food in shops, it tells me I'm greedy and stupid.
 
Lizaje

Lizaje

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You don't mean a literal voice, right?

But you should totally see a doctor about that too. That's not just depression.

With citalopram I think it's extremely unlikely it causes weight gain unless by making you eat more. Maybe it's just water.
 
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bpd2020

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I understand that the voices are making you believe you need to restrict food. The difficulty with you not telling your doctor these things is nothing changes. You are not stupid or greedy. You are in a lot of pain and you need support. Please tell your doctor all you are going through. You are suffering so much and you deserve support.
 
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george81

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Thank you both for your kind replies. I believe it's my own voice telling me these things but it's not nice to hear and can make food shopping a bit of a miserable chore. It's difficult regarding seeing the doctor at the moment due to the covid crisis and I feel bad taking up their time, I don't know what I want in terms of help as the last time she offered to refer me to the Mental Health people but I declined as I''m worried about opening a can of worms if I have counselling (I had it before regarding self harm and depression). People are already accusing me of being attention seeking over my weight loss and self harm and I feel I can't open up to anyone and really they don't care and don't understand, which is fair enough as I don't care about myself either.
 
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bpd2020

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You are not wasting anybodies time. You have been suffering for a long time and it does not seem to be getting any better. It is very hard having therapy but it is the only way for us to heal. It sounds like you have people in your life who are not understanding. That will add to you feeling unworthy. I am sad people are accusing you of seeking attention as that is the very last word I would use to describe you. George, you really do need to see the mental health team. You are in a very dark place right now and you need and deserve support.
 
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george81

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Thank you again, bdp2020. I do find it hard to open up and the first sign of not understanding means the end of conversation and not opening up further. It's sad but people have said I must be attention seeking with my weight loss as 'no one really bothers with me'. I've also been accused of losing weight so I can look better than my friends. I've also been told about my self harm 'are you doing it where people can see?', in a sarky way to make me feel like I'm deliberately doing it so people will see and ask questions. I do usually SH where people cannot see but sometimes I will do it in a visible place because of it being where I really want to do it and it's easier but not because I want people to see or ask about it. x
 
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bpd2020

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That makes sense. If you do not feel understood it will make you close up. It is hard enough opening up without being misunderstood too. Gosh, what a cruel thing people are saying to you. They sound so cold. You sound like you have very judgemental people around you. Is there anybody a bit more open minded or kind?
 
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george81

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Thank you bpd2020, not really, I have a very small social circle now. I will see how things go I guess and just try and get through each day but I really just don;t want to be here anymore. I have nothing to offer anyone and am a nobody. I don;t know who I am anymore either, I just don't really exist x
 
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bpd2020

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George, I am no expert but I think you would benefit from seeing a psychiatrist just to see if there is anything else going on. I always believed I had depression until I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. Having a diagnosis enabled me to have more understanding of my feelings and therapy helped too. I am currently having weekly therapy by phone. It is painful but it is the only way I will ever feel better. I can totally relate to you not wanting to be here any more and thinking you are nobody. These are very common thoughts I too have. Please tell your doctor you are struggling. Without help nothing will change. It is scary reaching out but you will have the full support of us all on here. Tonight is the first time I have replied to one of your posts. I used to read them and feel I could feel your pain but I did not reply as I felt I may upset you with my firm belief in therapy. Tonight I just thought I would risk it in the hope I would not upset you. This is proof people do care about you. You just need people who understand.
 
Lizaje

Lizaje

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There's nothing wrong with seeking attention anyway. People need attention. When they misunderstand you, you can either move past it even if it's difficult or talk about that misunderstanding. It's okay to tell them that you feel they don't understand.
 
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george81

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Thank you so much bpd2020, you are so very kind. I really do appreciate your replies and the replies of anyone on here, it is such a good site to be able to put down how you feel and what's going on in your mind. I feel therapy did help me at the time but since then a lot has happened and I guess I struggle to cope with things that other people wouldn't bother about or seemingly let it get to them. I take a lot of things to heart and see a lot of comments and body language as criticism and this gets me down for ages and can totally ruin a day when I felt a little more positive. I just feel utterly deflated and that my mood is not improving but at the same time I want to end my life and see steps towards lifting my mood as a deterrent to do so. I feel angry a lot but deflect this anger inwards towards myself. I am also aware that if I went into therapy I would be met with a lot of comments such as 'I am worse off than you and I haven't needed therapy' and 'I bet you love sitting there talking about yourself' which I had when I had therpay after a car accident a few years ago. Thank you again for listening/reading my ramblings x
 
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george81

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Thank you for your reply Lizaje, I don;t really want to attract attention as it's embarrassing when people enquire about about my scars but most people don't say anything. I've always just sorted myself out and never told anyone I was on medication/therapy etc x
 
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bpd2020

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You may be surprised to know that the things that bother you do actually bother others especially the members on here. If you feel somebody may say they are worse off then you then you are best not telling them you are having therapy. Pain is pain. It does not mean anybodies pain is worse then anothers. I cannot believe some of the awful things people tell you. Maybe you will be better off not talking about what is going on for you and just telling people who will not judge. Please do think about telling your doctor what you are going through. I know you think getting any help is a deterrent to ending your life but after therapy you may change your mind about wanting it to end.
 
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