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CBT, Counselling/Support

tH@l35

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Well-known member
Joined
Nov 8, 2009
Messages
45
Location
UK
Hi, I haven't posted in a while but could really do with some support. My name's John, I recently turned 21 and I am a student hoping to start Uni in September 2010. I should be happy but I am constantly depressed and socially anxious, I take 100mg Sertraline daily and I am on a waiting list to see an NHS therapist for CBT.
I want to ask anyone reading this if they have had CBT, or joined a support group, or even gone to a private therapist, and if so what is your experience of it? Beneficial/unhelpful? Please tell me as I have been waiting months now and I don't know how much longer I can go on with nothing but pills for support. I have zero friends and I can't talk to family about this and I know bottling all my thoughts and stress up inside me only makes things worse.

So please if anyone could just lend their support in whatever form it may just save my life. Also, any students reading this, if so how on earth do you cope? Please get in touch.

John.
 
lehcar24

lehcar24

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 4, 2009
Messages
109
Location
bedfordshire
Hi John xx

I recently went to the doctors and was gonna be reffered to CBT, i was also put on sertraline but they didnt really agree with me and whilst i was waiting for my CBT appointment my doctor called me to tell me im goin to be assessed first to get a full diagnosis cos i have many things wrong! lol

so i know none of the above helps jus wanted you to know ur not alone.. i get the whole no one to talk to thing as i am in the same boat im not even sure if i will be able to talk to professionals as im rubbish at speakin out! and i know its killin me.. i feel like im gonna burst!!

whilst your waiting to be seen why dont you look into a group thing.. or if you feel bad please go to your doctors dont suffer alone! i've been so alone miserable and scared for so long i jus made myself worse.. xxx

if you ever wanna chat u know we are all here xx and u can always email me if u like im on pretty much all the time! lol

i cant help with how to cope being a student as i couldnt cope school so never went onto higher education.. but dont they have guidence councellors?? and if im not mistaken its also confidential so u could go and spk to someone at uni ??

dont go through it alone xxx

Take care xx
Rachel xx
 
N

nina

Member
Joined
Jan 17, 2010
Messages
21
snap!

Hello John,:hug:

I have a son around your age I did not want him to grow up like me and all my hang ups.
I always praised him and recognised him for his good points as well as disipline of course.
He really was quite shy until he went to work in a local gym on reception making coffees and teas etc.
Big step I know but when I was young I worked on bars it really boosts your confidence and you make loads of new friends honestly one shift a week would really help you ...have a good think it will do you good plus you get paid to sociable.
Best of luck hon (y)
 
tH@l35

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Nov 8, 2009
Messages
45
Location
UK
Thank you so much for your words of advice Rachel and Nina:) they really do mean a great deal to me.

I believe sometimes what we need most of all is a person to listen and empathise with us. Something as simple as that can have such a positive impact, yet approaching another person can be one of the hardest actions to take.

I'm looking for a support group in my area now which i'm sure will help me a lot, as well as trying to start a hobby or volunteer at a charity. Something interesting but not too stressful. As for employment, I spent years working in retail where I endured daily panic attacks, way before I knew what condition I had, so I have reservations about bar work but as you say if it helps me then i'll give it a go.

I also think i'm going to seek a private therapist as waiting for a reply from the NHS is killing me. Every day I seem to distance myself more from the classmates and teachers around me, I wonder sometimes if they are even taking me seriously, do they even care about my success? I feel as if they hate me because of my odd behaviour, which makes me hate them. How can I explain to them what i'm going through?

John.
 
N

nina

Member
Joined
Jan 17, 2010
Messages
21
Big hugs hon

Hey John,

I really feel for you .Only do bar work if you are comfortable doing that ,it is good fun in a busy bar don't take it seriously if you do try it just do one shift a week or something don't put extra pressure on yourself.

If thats not your thing what about working with animals ....something like the donkey sanctuary or the quarantene kennels some pets dont get many visits whilst waiting in there I'm sure you would find it very rewarding.

I have two dogs they are my reason for getting off the couch some days.
It is tough not having a good network of friends I know myself from experience.
I would rather have non than the wrong ones who are uncaring I believe strongly in karma and stuff we go through is all character building.

You have your whole life ahead of you give your self a pat on the back for asking for help it might take time to get there but I believe you will get there.

Take one day at a time. Give yourself small things to do everyday that wouldnt normally do take the pressure off yourself.

Write a list of your GOOD points!
When you go to uni most people who are there will feel to some degree the same as you fear of the unknown and don't forget that people just wear a mask in public.

Listen going to uni is your new beginning new people who don't know you from all over the country possibly different countries imagine how they feel thousands of miles from home.

Take this opportunity and embrace it this is your new life .

If you are not happy on the tablets you are on go back to the doctor tell him you want to try something else before you go to uni in september.

I was on sertraline years ago I was ok for nine months then I started feeling detatched and disorientated on them.I stopped taking them and never went back the doctor big mistake .
You have worked in retail you can use your voice use it with your doctor, even if you hated that job think of what you learnt from it...take the positives
I'm no doctor but I have some idea how you feel and I have a son of 22.

Don't hesitate to vent it does wonders this forum has helped me greatly...your not alone!:flower2:
 
intelgal

intelgal

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Founding Member
Joined
Mar 17, 2008
Messages
1,413
Location
Yorkshire
I had CBT with an NHS therepist for just over a year. I found it very beneficial albeit challenging at times.


Good luck with it

Intel
x
 
L

Lil

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Joined
Dec 6, 2009
Messages
114
I guess CBT like most other treatments will work to varying degrees depending on the individual, their state of mind, views, willingness to work with the therapist/doctor, their own personal history, etc. and also how good the therapist doing the CBT is. So many things could affect how well it works.

I had it last year and it didn't seem to do anything for me at all, but that could have been my fault.
 
tH@l35

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Nov 8, 2009
Messages
45
Location
UK
Well thanks again:), I think I feel more optimistic about overcoming my weaknesses, especially now that I’ve had an assessment for therapy and hopefully start CBT before too long. I have a feeling it really will benefit me, even the initial assessment was useful. Because I don’t talk to anybody about my anxieties it really helped to be able to ‘open up’ and not feel as if I was being judged, and I have really needed someone to confide in for a long time.
Still not sure about 100mg Sertraline though, seems to really mess with my sleeping pattern and to be honest some days it doesn’t have much of a noticeable effect. Having difficulty with concentration as well - not helpful when I’m trying to study.
 
tH@l35

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Joined
Nov 8, 2009
Messages
45
Location
UK
Also ...

Also ...

Any advice/words on this?; - A lot of the time when I'm trying to get to sleep I get these thoughts in my head about death, being dead, other people dying etc. Really upsetting stuff that I can't get out of my head, and keeps me awake. Is this just depression? Shouldn't the medication stop these thoughts?
Anyone else get this?

And ...

Does anyone find that they talk to themselves (not out loud) in their head WAY too much? I'm pretty much constantly talking to myself about stuff, usually when I'm alone. Maybe this is the anxiety, but anyone with similar experiences?

Really appreciate some reassurance,

John.
 
tH@l35

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Joined
Nov 8, 2009
Messages
45
Location
UK
Sorry to be a pain ...

I posted this on another thread but I would seriously appreciate advice on how to explain my situation to others. Thanks.

When I started telling people that I suffer with anxiety and it can make me act a bit strange because of the effects I generally don't get anxious afterwards! And if I do it is no where near as bad and I can take a breather and go back in.
I've been thinking about telling others for ages and i'm sure it would help my situation. At college I really feel isolated from those around me and I think it's getting worse. I think that the people around me at college believe I hate them, but i'm just too anxious to talk to them. This may sound silly but; how can I properly explain to others what i'm going through?
John.
 
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