• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

Caring is not enough.

B

Broken Spirit

Member
Joined
Aug 16, 2008
Messages
16
Caring for someone who suffers mental illness is the biggest challenge i`ve faced in my life,its so hard. No matter what you try it never seems enough, its like fighting some sort of super power & for the sufferers it must be even worse. What happens to the minds of the people we love when they are struck down with mental illness, are those people gone forever ?. I live in hope that my loved one will return to me one day, complete & whole, living & enjoying her life the way she should be. Mental illness is so cruel & not only do they have to cope with the illness itself, they have to endure the disgraceful attitude of society to their condition. Not only has she lost friends since she became ill but so have i, well i guess they weren`t true friends in the first place, so its no loss really, but it still came as a shock. Others have amazed me with their support & i`m so thankful to them. Like i said at the start caring isn`t enough. if the staff in the psychiatric units don`t have a true vocation in the field of mental health then our loved ones don`t get the help & support they deserve. My experience has been that there are few nurses with a true vocation & for some its just a power trip in controlling vunerable people, on the pretext they are keeping them safe. We as carers, family or friends have no choice on where they go when they require hospital treatment & yet if it was any other health problem you get a choice in which hospital you attend. Personally i think these psychiatric units need exposure on the conditions & practices that occur in them, plus the lack of positive therapy. It seems to me that what society doesn`t know doesn`t matter when it comes to mental health patients, well it certainly matters to the people who truly love them. Quite honestly i wouldn`t have chosen to leave a stray dog in the unit my loved one was admitted to. Lets face it,we carers are the only ones they have to fight for them because society doesn`t care , so maybe through this forum we can join forces & get them a better deal.
 
M

mad as a hatter

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 23, 2008
Messages
2,167
Location
scotland
having had experince off the mental health wards as i,ve got bipolor i titally agree the way ur treated is nothin short disgrace nurses got no time for u some them shouldn,t be in that job as they simply don,t care and c u as non human bein like u got no rights cause u got mental health issues like they blame u for bein ill left 2 ur on devices most time u could kill ur self ne time in these wards cause the nurses haven,t got a clue what,s goin on half time cause they don,t seem 2 stick there head out office door for hrs on end fair enough they got a lot paper work these days but what,s more important patients welfare or paper work
 
M

maudikie

Guest
It is very hard being a arer. Is your loved one receiving treatment? If you are dis-satisfied with any home or hospital she is in then make a complaint in writing to the Patient Care Trust and the Mental health commission. They should visit the establishment and make sure that all is being done that can be, or that errors are put right. Take care of yourself. Have you had a carer's assessment of need. If not do so. It is your right, and they should be able to help.:)
 
B

Broken Spirit

Member
Joined
Aug 16, 2008
Messages
16
Thanks Maudikie

I have to admit i was out of my depth the first time she was admitted to a psychiatric unit, i was in shock because i wasn`t expecting her to be so ill, there had been no previous indications whatsoever of mental illness. It was an awful experience for both of us & i can honestly say i never knew such places existed. One problem i did encounter in getting support as a carer was the fact that we live in different counties even though we are only about 40mins apart. I`m not sure if i even qualify as an official carer because she doesn`t normally live with me, although when she is ill i bring her to my house to look after her. Nobody has ever offered me a carer`s assessment & i don`t even know what thats about. The first time she was admitted i did write & complain about how we were both treated & i went straight to the top, but it didn`t do any good as the reply i received said to write to the unit she was in. Whats the point in that complaining to the same people you`re complaining about. Even the home treatment team were rude to me after her discharge, they kept telling me to leave her flat & wait outside in the street each time they visited. If i had known then what i know now i would have taken a journalist in with me, what a wonderfully useless thing hindsight is. Thanks for caring enough to respond to my post. Take care.
 
H

homegirl

Member
Joined
Aug 20, 2008
Messages
21
Location
south west england
Do you feel able to say which unit your daughter was in? It is distressing to find you loved ones having to put up with poor care and attention.
Best wishes
 
R

ramboghettouk

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2008
Messages
16,803
Location
london
I know it was hard for my family when i became ill, my little sister still won't speak to me and she's much older now, my 86 yr old mother is too old to handle it, not that that stops social services from trying to pressurise my family into doing their caring job, they'r quite happy for me to make panicky calls to my family

The help i've got from mental health services i sometimes feel theres an argument for closing them down as totally useless, not so much the psychiatrists and drs though they're changing

What do i want? as one psychiatrist put it well i replied "decent benefits and decent housing" i'd add now an end to discrimination particualarly by the police who you just can't rely on when the shit hits the fan
 
B

Broken Spirit

Member
Joined
Aug 16, 2008
Messages
16
ramboghettouk : are you saying your little sister doesn`t speak to you simply because you have suffered mental illness ?. Also as regards better housing, do you think mental health patients would fair better if they were housed together in groups of homes, with specific support services, much the same way the councils house the elderly.
 
Top