Can't Sleep, Devil Telling Me to Burn, Non-Stop

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sallimae76

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Voice is strong tonight. Don't know why. Sometimes it gets faint and I think it is going to go away again, but then it comes back stronger. Trying to figure out what crime I committed as a 43 year old virgin who volunteered as a big sister and served as a public service lawyer. I always new this life was an illusion, and that supernatural forces were going to destroy any positive life I would try to put together.

The powers that be want me to believe that my niece is the picture of motherhood, when she was sexually abused and tried to perform oral sex on me as a 4 year old child, when I was 13. I know this whole thing is a farce, and that the invisible man lives all around me. Doesn't even try to hide anymore.
 
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sallimae76

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Also started calling me "whore" again. The Judeo-Christian god is NOT my god. We need a woman to rise up. One time a voice told me "Why do you like to have sex with a snake?" Again, I am a 43 year old virgin.
 
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sallimae76

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I contacted a paranormal investigator and I am not surprised that they told me they were "closed for business". I will keep trying to get confirmation from another that they hear these voices too. He has so much hatred for me as a woman, he can't stay quiet all day. I just need someone to spend 24 hours with me.

And of course my local parish priest didn't call me back.
 
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sallimae76

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He exposes me to pornography as a child and then is surprised when I masturbate as a result, then calls me a whore?
 
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sallimae76

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I even offered them a way out, forgive and forget the past, and they couldn't take it.
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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Some medications will help you sleep as they have a mild sedating effect but not all, I take Aripiprazole in the morning and that doesn't make me feel tired but I take Risperidone at night and that's supposed to make you feel tired so it depends on what they give you.

The best thing from medication was that it lowers the volume of my voice so much I can usually ignore him and fall asleep naturally.

Before medication my voice had the ability to wake me up at any time, and he did 5-6 times a night to talk about the dreams we had. He even had the ability to manipulate my dreams and would often attack me in them using one form or another, sometimes he would appear as my doppelganger and sometimes as another person, this has now stopped thanks to medication.

Unfortunately nobody can hear your voice but you, I've had people in the same room as me before medication and only I could hear him, once you get medication it'll stop him talking as he now does and force him to be in your mind like your own thoughts are, much easier to block that way if you find something to read before bed or at any time. It's one reason I like the forums, it always gives me a little peace from him when reading or writing.

Hang in there for now, you've shown incredible strength so far and this voice will only make you stronger if you have the will to fight it and I believe you do. Medication can be a powerful weapon to use against voices but your mind is equally as powerful.
 
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sallimae76

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Thank you Zoe. I don't know why it is loud sometimes. It is quiet again.
 
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Zoe1

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I think I get something similar with my thoughts
like if I have a pain in my body
that was very loud today , and my mind was exaggerating it so much
and then all of a sudden its all gone
I think maybe I hear voices in my mind

:love:
 
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sallimae76

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Mine are a little different Zoe. Not brought on by stress. More like NWiddi, just a voice that speaks 24/7, from the moment I wake up, until I go to sleep.
 
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Zoe1

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n yeah that is different

lots of love Zoe :love:
 

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