Can't seem to shake this.....

life2live

life2live

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Nov 9, 2014
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#1
I have been trying so hard to shake my depression and get back to semi normal but I can't seem to shake it. Everytime I feel like I am OK something knocks me back and I have to rebuild my confidence all over again. Its like groundhog day, I have to have everything go perfect and it never does.
 
prairiechick

prairiechick

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#2
I am sorry you are struggling so much. I know very well how that feels. And when you start to feel better you want so desperately for it to last, and you get so scared that it won't. I don't know if you do this, but when I start to feel a bit better, I start analyzing my mood many times through the day, and if I feel a bit tired or down, I get scared that I'm on that slippery slide back down. I'm on the forum for awhile if you want to chat.
 
tabbykitten

tabbykitten

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#3
Believe me it is normal to feel like you are not making any progress but you probably are, little by little. Keep on fighting and remember you are not alone
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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#4
Unfortunately the road to recovery isn't a nice, straight forward path.

I absolutely know what you mean when you talk about being set back.
Sometimes it's really hard to find the enthusiasm or motivation to better your life when it seems that the rug could be pulled out from under your feet at any time, making all your previous efforts worthless.
What I would say though is that it's not actually worthless. Each step you take is a step to getting stronger.
I know mental health teams through the word 'resilience' around a lot, and personally I can't stand it. But from my own experience you do get stronger and it's a real achievement when you notice it.
These days, something that would have set me off into a sobbing mess and knocked me back several years ago barely affects me now.

I am getting more confident, and my god, if I can do it then anybody can.

Just be gentle with yourself and try to find some things to add to your life that you can enjoy and that can't be taken away from you so easily.
At the moment i'm doing pottery classes and pay to see my own counsellor - both of these things are really nurturing for me and I know that they're both consistent things that will only end when I decide I no longer need them.
I hope that makes sense? x