Cant deal with shopping

C

Confusedandanxious

Well-known member
Joined
May 5, 2019
Messages
345
Location
Uk
I was getting shopping delivered because I struggled so much actually going.
I then struggled to deal with the delivery coming to my house.
My dad started taking me shopping, I got comfortable in one shop and was able to go there. I couldn't get my full shop and relied heavily on amazon.
They changed the shop around and I could no longer deal with it. Because Amazon was costing me far too much, I tried a different shop with my dad.
I finally got my route and routine and have been shopping in the same place, for a couple of years now.
Those self checkouts made it even better for me as I no longer need to deal with people.
Now my issue is my dad. He complains all of the time to the staff about nothing. Sometimes its valid, but most of the time it's like hes creating a scene for nothing.
Today when complaining he had to say "she cant push the trolley, that's why we share" and now I can not let that go and I'm already wondering what I'm going to do for next week. I do not want to go shopping again.
They will be wondering why I cant push the trolley when I look physically able, and I am physically able to - just mentally it causes torture for me.
My mind tells me that everybody looks at me thinking I'm looking like an idiot, that I cant push it properly, that I'm doing it wrong. My mind gets filled with negative thoughts that others may or may not be thinking and so I avoid. Otherwise I'd flee.
I've overcome a lot just to get to where I am with my shopping.
In a broken leg sense - I've gone from being unable to walk to now using crutches.
I had even started pushing the trolley in short bursts.

After typing all of this...I'm thinking my dad might be doing this on purpose so that I keep needing him.
 
C

Confusedandanxious

Well-known member
Joined
May 5, 2019
Messages
345
Location
Uk
Anxiety sucks. It really does. I shouldn't care about this, I should just be able to let it go. Instead my mind keeps it on repeat trying to think of every scenario, all negative of course.
 
Urban Hermit

Urban Hermit

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Joined
Jan 18, 2019
Messages
2,722
I have a suggestion, and it's only that , it could help or it may not... Try to keep a record of each time you go and tally up good and bad times and hopefully you will be able to see visually that its more good than bad ....
Sometimes we can fight anxiety with trying to remove the emotional element and analysis the situation with rational thought which I know is really hard because anxiety comes largely from deeper irrational thoughts ...

I use this method when facing tough things like train travel, I look back with my logical mind and think we'll the last three times have been fine, so hopefully this time will be too

Just my two cents xx
 
C

Confusedandanxious

Well-known member
Joined
May 5, 2019
Messages
345
Location
Uk
I have a suggestion, and it's only that , it could help or it may not... Try to keep a record of each time you go and tally up good and bad times and hopefully you will be able to see visually that its more good than bad ....
Sometimes we can fight anxiety with trying to remove the emotional element and analysis the situation with rational thought which I know is really hard because anxiety comes largely from deeper irrational thoughts ...

I use this method when facing tough things like train travel, I look back with my logical mind and think we'll the last three times have been fine, so hopefully this time will be too

Just my two cents xx
Thank you! That is definitely worth a try!
 
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