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cant cope with alcoholic

I

indigo6

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 30, 2019
Messages
509
Location
UK
Im sorry firstly if anyone out there is an alcoholic do not take this personally.

My current co tenant is and its compounding my mental state. I had alco parents and my mother that was aggressive with it. Its their way or the highway. She works part time and drinks the rest. She has some kind of developing dementia and many faces. She is manipulative and devious. She lies constantly and borrows money from anyone. Her hygiene is very poor and the house is a tip now. She is difficult and prickly. I have decided I cant let her get an argument out of me anymore (loves arguing, like my mother did) so I stay out of her way all the time. Shes gone to Landlord to get 1st strike and complain about me being depressed.....when its down to me seeking refuge from her. I do no harm to anyone being like this.

I can only see she likes to be up and distracted and so called happy. I state now I DO NOT care if she has problems...shes made my life very difficult since about a few weeks of arriving. I have me to think about (thats what therapy has taught me) She is so demotivating for me to be around. It is part of my thing that I keep my surroundings clean and tidy and she has taken that away. I do physical volunteering, I try to help myself and I come back to her messed up head house stinking f booze and dirty. Its compounding my mental state isnt it?
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
3,229
Location
Nowhere
hi indigo

yes its not helping your mental state for sure

you have no way of living apart ?

also you can get alot of help from Al-Anon which I go to
its a branch of Alcoholics Anonymous for the friends and relatives

the are online and in face to face meetings
and have nearly 100 years hands on experience to draw on

I couldn't do without them

:hug5:
 
Cpt_Stunning

Cpt_Stunning

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 23, 2019
Messages
559
Location
Plymouth
I drink too much, & I've been called an alcoholic before, but it's a complicated issue.

Someone can be a functioning alcoholic, like I am, I've been in the same job for 21 years, always wear different underwear & socks each day, room always clean, but I still manage to drink as much as I can.

So, do you think the issue is really the alcohol or just her? I had a woman at work who had terrible hygiene problems, but she didn't drink, just ate a lot & hoarded.

I really don't think she feels very good about herself, obviously I don't know her, but one question I would ask, is she a hoarder? Because stopping hoarding is a good step forward.
 
I

indigo6

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 30, 2019
Messages
509
Location
UK
Thankyou both. My Dad was beautifully clean and tidy, in himself and things no one would have known. He had incredible self control. My mother opposite, she reminds me of her. I understand vics. Up til now I have been fortunate, its a wonder with what I had rond me as a child.

I didnt think it was an AA issue. not friend or family, I have no interest in her wellbeing. I also think they will be on her side rather than seeing it from mine, setting me back, impeding progress. No not a hoarder, why did you think she may be hoarder?
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

Well-known member
Joined
May 29, 2019
Messages
1,385
Location
London
Dude its cool i dont hang around people who smoke meth ok maybe meth is a lot worse than drinking but same thing enviroment is a massive part to how you will go in life make a change in that and you will be one step closer to what ever your goal is
 
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