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Can you help me help a friend?

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deepgreen

New member
Joined
Aug 2, 2017
Messages
2
Hello everyone, and nice to e-meet you!

I’ve registered to this forum to find out if I can be of help to a person that I fear might be in a difficult situation for her mental health.

The person (let’s call her Amal) is not really my close friend but we have studied together at university and were friendly with each other.
She now lives overseas and I only hear from her through Facebook.

I got worried about her when she started posting more and more frequently gloomy posts, such as pessimistic quotes about the evil nature of human kind, especially men, and about her host and native countries. She is now posting a few a day.
I know from friends that she has issues finding a job and has recently separated with her husband, who has returned their country of origin.

I am particularly concerned because I believe she lives is isolation, far away from friends who could support her in such a difficult moment.

I wonder if there’s anything I could do remotely for her.
I understand this is very limited information, but I’d be interested in hearing if the users of this forum recognise signs of any specific mental condition, so that I can be careful when addressing her.
 
Kerome

Kerome

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 29, 2013
Messages
12,748
Location
Europe
Hi and :welcome: deepgreen. That's a difficult question... the best you can do I think is let her know that you're thinking of her and would like to support her in this difficult time, and maybe establish a contact via whatsapp or other IM?

I don't think there's enough information there to say anything about her mental health - everyone in these difficult situations is bound to have a few things to say, and it's not necessarily meaningful. But it does sound like she's had a few stressful events, separating from her husband and then staying behind in a foreign country is hard.
 
B

Boring

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 29, 2017
Messages
1,885
Location
Bronx, New York
welcome to mentalhealthforum. sit back on our couch, sip some cold root beer, and enjoy the posts, my man
 
exyz

exyz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 14, 2017
Messages
2,773
Hello deepgreen

Welcome to the forum.

I am not sure that I can add to anything that Kerome has already said.

Is she in her country of origin? If not, and she wants to return to it then perhaps you could help her with contacts and maybe returning.

You sound a good friend to have:flowers:
 
R_Sxo

R_Sxo

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2017
Messages
2,202
Hey deepgreen,

I wanted to start by saying what an amazing friend you are! "Amal" is very lucky to have someone who looks out for her like you do, so I really respect that you're going out of your way to help her :)

The combination of dark posts and social withdrawal are certainly concerning, and you've done well to pick up on that. I know you've said that this is limited information, but she seems to be upset about her separation (which would explain her posts about men and maybe other countries). The difficulty in finding a job, coupled with living away from friends, would probably take its toll on her too. She definitely seems to be in a lot of pain.

I'm not a clinical psychiatrist, and therefore I can't give an official or accurate diagnosis, but she seems to show a few symptoms of depression. It may be that she is in a rough patch, and she will be better soon, but if it develops into a mental health issue, then these events would contribute.

The best thing you can do for her is to communicate with her. Keep talking to her, so that a path of communication stays open. By providing her with that, you give her some social channel, so that she could feel some social connection. Perhaps using this to discuss her pain would allow her to take the weight off her shoulders, although it may be difficult to endure.

If it gets a lot worse, then you could pose the idea of her meeting a GP to get professional help. It may be met with fierce resistance, but it may be needed, so keep that in mind in case things take a turn for the worse.

I hope your friend gets better soonx

Much love <3
 
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deepgreen

New member
Joined
Aug 2, 2017
Messages
2
Wow, thank you so much to all of you for your kind answers. This is really helpful.

exyz, she is not in her country of origin but quite far away. And in her posts she seems to indicate that she is not planning to go back soon.

I will definitely try to build a connection with her and explore a bit better how she feels. Hopefully she just needs someone to talk to :cheers:
 
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