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can,t go on ne more

M

mad as a hatter

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i feel like life,s not worth living ne more i,m in so much despair 2 nite that i feel like i,m goin tk an overdose i can,t cope ne more i feel so let down by the mh services the simply don,t care never have i can,t stand this pain i,ve got ne more i try and fight it everyday but it feel so hopeless i can,t win this fight ne more maybe i don,t want 2 it,s simple as that it does sound like i,m givin up and i feel guilty about that cause i,m lettin every 1 down especially my family but i feel they,d be better off without me havin 2 look after me i should be able 2 do that myself but idon,t now how 2 ne more this soundslike a bit rant maybbe it is but it,s how i do feel life is shit and i can,t stand it ne more
 
honeyquince

honeyquince

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Hey Mad as a Hatter, sorry things are feeling so low at the moment. Tough, but do try to remember that better times are ahead.

We're here for you!
 
M

mad as a hatter

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thanks honey for ur support things do feel so hopeless right now can,t c past gettin through the nxt hr never mind it gettin ne better
 
honeyquince

honeyquince

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Hi there, I've to go to bed now... :sleep: but if things get worse then please make a phone call! Sams nos. is: 08457 90 90 90

Take care and I look forward to seeing you around tomorrow,

Honey, xx
 
Lozzi_1004

Lozzi_1004

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Hi mad as a hatter!

How're you feeling today?? :hug:

Lozzi :flowers:
 
M

mad as a hatter

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hi lozzi i,m just about coping the mood swings r terrible but it always seems 2 be at nite my mood takes a complete dive i feel in so much despair it,s just a nightmare i c my pdoc soon so it,s just a matter tryin hang on till then she is really good hopefully i will be able 2 get some more help but i,m not holding my breath mh services here r a total joke most time
 
rollinat

rollinat

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Glad to hear that you will see your psychiatrist soon and hope they can offer you some more support. It just seems such a lottery depending on where you live.

Take care.

Rollinat
 
sweet insanity

sweet insanity

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Plz plz hold on...things get better around the bend...its easy for me to say...but I´ve been there and the mere fact that you are still here is that you my friend is a survivor and you will get through this...u must trust me on this....
Hold on....:hug:
 
Lozzi_1004

Lozzi_1004

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O'm really glad you're OK! I was reading the thread this morning thinking "oh my gosh, I hope you're OK" I can sympathise with you there mad as a hatter! My mood is always worse on a night, whether its one end of the scale or the other :hug: just hang in there til you can see your pysch
:flowers:
 
M

mad as a hatter

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thanks all u for ur support it,s so hard the pain inside is so bad at times but i won,t have 2 tell u what that,s like i hate the night times i feel the despair already when i went on 1 my mad spendin sprees a few wks back i bought this computer it,s the best thing i ever had cause i,d never known about the forums and so much support i get i,m goin away with my family at the weekend for a wk somewhere nice quiet i,m taken me dog so i can maybe have some time on me own then i c my pdoc 2 days after i get bk so it,s not so bad it just by luck my pdoc is so good our i,d be a lot worse than i already am it,s just in between appointments i,m strugglin but she doesn,t know how much so that,s somethin i,m holdin on 2 seeing her that sounds sad but she,s the only mh support i got i,ve had constant battle with them for yrs telling me nothin wrong with u sayin 2 my parents has she always been a attention seeker but my pdoc always stood by me in other words sayin other docs was wrong but took 11 yrs 2 diagnose bi polor had 1t 7 yrs i feel like i,m losing it at times i just want 2 write 2 nite but i don,t wanna go on and on
 
Lozzi_1004

Lozzi_1004

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You need too be honest with you psych at your next appointment! :hug: Tell her just how much you struggle between the appointments, it's good that she's so supportive you need that at times like this :flowers:
It's amazing how a silly spending spree can uncover something you really need

The week away sounds nice, might be just what you need and i'm sure your doggie will look after you :)

Lozzi:flowers:
 
M

mad as a hatter

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i feel like shit again it,s just such a struggle i fell asleep in a really postive mood woke feeling suicidal same as before can,t go on ne more i hate this bloody mixed mood i want escape it i feel like crying i feel so low i can,t believe i,m lettin this happen like i,m bein punished or somethin the pain i,m feelin again is so bad i want 2 cut myself i,ve tried talking 2 my pdoc about this but i struggle 2 do this i hate life at times but somethin seems 2 keep me goin i wish it would let me go and i,d be at piece with myself i,ve been put on this planet by god 2 suffer cause i,m such a bad person and they all hate me especially the mh services i can,t fight them ne more been yrs off hurt off them bastards treat me like i,m 5 yrs old or somethin well i,m not oh this hell i,m in i think
 
rollinat

rollinat

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:hug: Mad as a Hatter.

As you said - i hate life at times but somethin seems 2 keep me goin - hang on in there, keep posting and I hope you can get some help - when do you see your psychiatrist?

Take care of yourself.

Rollinat :flowers:
 
M

mad as a hatter

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Messages
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thanks rollinat these mood swings r totally off the wall 2 nite i,ve went opposite way now feel so high like i could tk the world on got me ipod i wanna dance in the street not in 7 yrs off havin bipolor have i experinced likes this it,s a mad place 2 be i c my pdoc on the 18th this month goin on holiday this weekend for a wk lookin forward 2 that be nice quiet don,t mind these highs it,s when they dive into the lows i feel in so much despair like earlier i simply don,t get this
 
M

mad as a hatter

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Messages
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here we go again my mood took a major dive again and i feel in so much despair suicidal again this how it,s been last few wks crazy highs and bad lows how much more can i tk this i,m tryin hold 2 i c my pdoc i feel like hittin my head off a brick wall in total anger i hate life and i hate bein like this i know it was my fault i got bipolor cause the what happened 2 me in the past i shouldn,t never let it it,s destroyin me this it eats away u why do i feel so guilty doesn,t matter how hard i fight bk it always seems 2 beat me there,s always a barrier put in front me 2 climb over i,m probabaly nott makin ne sense ne more no doubt my mood will totally turn again and i,ll feel high can,t c ne way out this hell i,m in
 
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