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Can someone please help is this HOCD?

W

Winter111

Member
Joined
Aug 28, 2020
Messages
16
Location
Netherlands
Hi guys. I’m a female and I’ve been have unwanted thoughts about my sexuality it all started with a complete random “what if I’m gay and I don’t know” I have completely freaked out. My thoughts want to tell me I’m gay like in my head I’ll be doing something and it’ll go I’m gay! I get so so much anxiety. I have never ever been sexually attracted to females, yes I’ve thought she’s pretty, or she looks nice in that dress! But now I keep thinking oh have I looked at her Cos I’m attracted to her. Or I worry I’m with my boyfriend for a cover up and I’m in some sort of denial I can’t imagine being with a woman. I don’t know what to do! Pleas someone help
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
9,155
Location
Nashua NH
Yes it sounds like it very well could be. Is this interrupting your daily activities to the extent that working with a therapist would be useful?
 
ZaraHOCD

ZaraHOCD

Active member
Joined
Jan 13, 2021
Messages
35
Location
Pennsylvania, Philadelphia.
Hey, I hope you’re feeling well now.

From what I’ve read so far, it seems to me as if you had HOCD. I too had it, and I know the struggles, such as the compulsions, rumination, etc. I won’t tell you that you aren’t gay because you said it yourself. Think of things differently and approach these thoughts in an instructive manner. “I might be gay, or not. Maybe I’m straight.” Accept the thoughts and stop overthinking it. Distract your mind, instead. Like, try something new or do something you loved to do .
 
W

Winter111

Member
Joined
Aug 28, 2020
Messages
16
Location
Netherlands
Thanks so much for your reply! Have you had this? I am beginning to get better, I still have some odd thoughts though and they still do bother me. I don’t know why they bother me so much they just do. There not therapists near me so I’ve had to deal with it on my own
 
ZaraHOCD

ZaraHOCD

Active member
Joined
Jan 13, 2021
Messages
35
Location
Pennsylvania, Philadelphia.
Hello!

I am so glad you are feeling better. I’m sorry you’ve had to go through this alone. And, yes, I am suffering from HOCD, but, as of right now, it’s a bit better.
 
ZaraHOCD

ZaraHOCD

Active member
Joined
Jan 13, 2021
Messages
35
Location
Pennsylvania, Philadelphia.
I believe it is because we add more to our thoughts. Say, “What if I’m gay?” Then, you’ll start the compulsions and the rumination, etc. If we would just accept them and look at them as they were insignificant, they wouldn’t add up to pain and anxiety.
 
W

Winter111

Member
Joined
Aug 28, 2020
Messages
16
Location
Netherlands
That makes so much sense cos mine started from a “ what if I’m gay” and it went from there
 
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