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Can someone explain unstable self image to me?

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spacingspaces

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Mar 13, 2018
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I have read up on unstable self image lots of times and i can't seem to fully grasp what it means for some reason. Maybe that's a sign hat i suffer from it?
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

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Hi there.

I'm just guessing...I think it means the way you view yourself changes frequently(?)
 
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Girl interupted

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That you bend your emotion/mood to reflect/pacify and avoid being the target. This could possibly come from childhood and maladaptive coping skills you used to avoid getting hurt.

Over time, that frequent changing of personae can lead to feeling unstable, where you have trouble identifying who you really are at your core.

A therapist can help with that.
 
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wonderwoman18

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Unstable self image means one day you can feel confident and beautiful and smart and then later in the day you can feel like a loser who is unemployed and ugly and dumb. We borderlines are really good at reacting to our environments so we can change how we feel about ourselves throughout the day.
 
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spacingspaces

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Mar 13, 2018
Messages
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Unstable self image means one day you can feel confident and beautiful and smart and then later in the day you can feel like a loser who is unemployed and ugly and dumb. We borderlines are really good at reacting to our environments so we can change how we feel about ourselves throughout the day.
That does sound a lot like me. If I do one thing wrong I can end up feeling like I'm useless at everything and a failure at life.
 
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spacingspaces

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Joined
Mar 13, 2018
Messages
261
That you bend your emotion/mood to reflect/pacify and avoid being the target. This could possibly come from childhood and maladaptive coping skills you used to avoid getting hurt.

Over time, that frequent changing of personae can lead to feeling unstable, where you have trouble identifying who you really are at your core.

A therapist can help with that.
Can you give an example of that?
 
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Girl interupted

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For me I was always conscious of my mother’s moods. I would find a way to make myself as small as possible to avoid her wrath.

This often would mean me being her mirror, changing my mood to fix hers.

Over time it lead to an identity crisis where I could not properly evaluate my own emotions, or determine where they came from.

With hard work with my therapist I’m getting better at identifying happy, sad, angry, etc.

If you can’t identify emotion it creates instability, and perpetuates. What takes a ”normal” person minutes to figure out and resolve, would often take me days.

That leads to emotional stagnation and further prolongs the emotion.
 
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spacingspaces

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Mar 13, 2018
Messages
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For me I was always conscious of my mother’s moods. I would find a way to make myself as small as possible to avoid her wrath.

This often would mean me being her mirror, changing my mood to fix hers.

Over time it lead to an identity crisis where I could not properly evaluate my own emotions, or determine where they came from.

With hard work with my therapist I’m getting better at identifying happy, sad, angry, etc.

If you can’t identify emotion it creates instability, and perpetuates. What takes a ”normal” person minutes to figure out and resolve, would often take me days.

That leads to emotional stagnation and further prolongs the emotion.
I kinda see what you mean but i'm still not fully understanding it. I feel so stupid lol. Basically, it takes you a while to figure out whether you are feeling happy or sad, etc?
 
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spacingspaces

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Mar 13, 2018
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Unstable self image means one day you can feel confident and beautiful and smart and then later in the day you can feel like a loser who is unemployed and ugly and dumb. We borderlines are really good at reacting to our environments so we can change how we feel about ourselves throughout the day.
If i do something wrong i start questioning everything about myself like for example if i was playing a video game and i died or made a mistake i would start thinking i'm stupid and a failure at life. Would that be unstable self image?
 
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Girl interupted

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I kinda see what you mean but i'm still not fully understanding it. I feel so stupid lol. Basically, it takes you a while to figure out whether you are feeling happy or sad, etc?
This is just me.

Your experience may be different.

You may punish yourself for no good reason, have symptoms that are similar to bipolar, and often get misdiagnosed....
 
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spacingspaces

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261
This is just me.

Your experience may be different.

You may punish yourself for no good reason, have symptoms that are similar to bipolar, and often get misdiagnosed....
I haven't been diagnosed with bpd but my psychiatrist said I show symptoms of it. Also what I'm going through is similar to bipolar with the UPS and downs.. etc. I think I do have bpd. Do you think I should mention bpd to my psychiatrist again?
 
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Girl interupted

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I would stop focusing on the label and work towards getting better.

Doesnt matter if it’s bpd or bipolar, what matters is the effort you put into it.
 
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spacingspaces

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Mar 13, 2018
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I would stop focusing on the label and work towards getting better.

Doesnt matter if it’s bpd or bipolar, what matters is the effort you put into it.
The best way to recover is to know what's wrong with me though.
 
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Darknesssdaughter

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Nov 2, 2019
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I have read up on unstable self image lots of times and i can't seem to fully grasp what it means for some reason. Maybe that's a sign hat i suffer from it?
Exactly the same problem I had in mind now. So thanks for posting this for me also.
 
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