- Feb 12, 2019
I have had passive suicidal thoughts resurfacing time to time for a while, but lately it has become more regular with added depression and anxiety in my life. While I don't see the point in living, I also don't see the point in dying right now either, and thus I am not driven to kill myself. However, these passive thoughts are causing me increasingly more concern. These thoughts come up rather randomly about how it would be like to not exist, how it would be like to kill myself, how it would be like to die to a music that I might be listening to, and it goes on and on. I do not give these thoughts real consideration, but I have been thinking whether it can lead to something real when I am feeling more depressed or anxious some days. Normally I try to reason through these thoughts and get on with life, but when more depressed I have found this ability to reason all the more strained. I don't know whether a point could come where my ability to reason may entirely be suspended and I end up really killing myself.
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