Can a schizophrenic know they're schizophrenic?

[snowdog28]

Hello there, I've been suffering from depression for the last two years and during the last year I think I may have developed mild schizophrenia.

I've had terrible short/immediate term memory (for example I'll get up to check a web site, open my browser and forget what I was going to look for) and I've been having hallucinations (I sometimes see things moving out of the corner of my eye and think people are giving me funny looks on the bus and when walking down the street). I'm diabetic and around the same sort of time this all started I entertained the idea that somebody was using my insulin injections to control me, but immediately dismissed it as being ridiculous.

I had a home visit by a psychologist when all this started happening and lied when she asked me if I was having hallucinations.

I'm also finding it difficult to leave the house and haven't met up with any of my friends for a few months, ignoring phone calls and making excuses via text messages. I've started to sleep during the day and am awake at night too which isn't doing my diabetes a great deal of good.

This is going to sound ridiculous but I've been a diabetic since I was 5 years old and have a syringe phobia of all things so I often can't face doing my injections and on average miss one out of three a day.

My Dad is an alcoholic and had a breakdown after suffering from depression and my Mum had to call the police when he started to smash up the house, when the police arrived the police doctor asked my Mum if he'd been diagnosed schizophrenic so I'm worried that I may have 'inherited' it from my Dad.

I'm just wondering what to do now, I know I should go and see my doctor but I can't face it at the moment. Any advice would be much appreciated

 

[Apotheosis]

It's difficult. People vary in the degree of insight that they have into their mental state.

TBH - I am still trying to work out what schizophrenia is? I mean that seriously, & still working out how to best live with what I have experienced.

The stock response - Doc's > Labels > Med's. Fair enough if you see that as a solution - most do indeed appear to.

Personally - I've not found an answer in that route. It explains nothing to me, it addresses nothing, & it doesn't provide a solution.

 

[IntrospectionFtw!]

Like apo said its difficult you've only got to read our posts to know,
theres no guarantees or exact science to treating these things.

are you on any medications atall anti deppressents anti anxietys?
taking any illeagal drugs?

 

[rasselas]

...

apotheosis... if you havent already, try and get a copy of 'reconstructing schizophrenia' - it really is fundamental!

 

[rasselas]

...

to answer the OP... it was partly because of my insights that i was forced to resign from schizophrenia...

my union rep was hopeless so I hadn't a third leg to stand on...

 

[Apotheosis]

apotheosis... if you havent already, try and get a copy of 'reconstructing schizophrenia' - it really is fundamental!

Thanks - I will try & get a copy - the thing is that I have a lot of books waiting to be read already. & I have read many on this subject. I'd go with Jung & John Weir Perry on these perspectives.

 

[snowdog28]

Like apo said its difficult you've only got to read our posts to know,
theres no guarantees or exact science to treating these things.

are you on any medications atall anti deppressents anti anxietys?
taking any illeagal drugs?

I'm taking Mirtazapine and Citalopram for my depression but I've had a bad couple of months and have had some days where I think that not only would I be better off dead but everyone that knows me would be better off too. I have unbelievably bad luck going back years and my bad luck rubs off onto my friends and family as well as all companies I've worked for. I know that's going to sound a bit loopy, and it probably is a bit loopy but it's something that I believe, and as far as I know is another symptom of schizophrenia.

I know that I should seek help when feeling suicidal and luckily have a psychiatric hospital 10 minutes away on the bus so will go there if I'm going to do anything stupid.

I used to work behind a bar years ago and drank heavily (20-odd pints on average per day for a few years) but have never touched drugs apart from trying a joint once and not liking it and having my drink spiked with speed once. Apart from that I only go near caffeine and I rarely drink now as I know it makes my depression feel terrible afterwards. I still drink socially, but not to excess and haven't been out for a couple of months and don't drink indoors unless I'm being sociable.

 

[IntrospectionFtw!]

Mirtazapine is known to cause hallucinations its a side effect, that could possibly be the reason.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mirtazapine#Side_effects

http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/home.php search around the forums for Mirtazapine.

 

[rasselas]

...

reconstructing... is a series of essays from various professionals... they begin at the beginning.... with the history ofthe word... and the flawed science that gave rise to it... i cannot emphasise how this is just so crucial as the foundation,,, obviously it's your joutney... and your retina... but even if i have to adopt the techniques of clockwork orangr... you really must read it!!!!

id be happy to lend you my copy...

 

[snowdog28]

Okay cheers for the info, will look into that. The hallucinations aren't really bothering me that much as I know that they're not real, but if I do have schizophrenia will my opinion of that change..? Will I get worse over time if not treated..?

 

[rasselas]

....

if it becomes messianic let me know, ill invite you to my house.

im a big fan of fish, any fish, particularly the best salmon. i could but ONE and you could help me fill up my chest freezer with it. id be your disciple then, oh yes.

seriously, i feel for your dilemma. should you wait, see how it pans out or seek to get it (and much else about you) negated.

never an easy decision

although at some point there might be people making that decision for you

crushing... and. wil make your liberty a little less for the rest of your life if you ever get sectioned

 

[Apotheosis]

reconstructing... is a series of essays from various professionals... they begin at the beginning.... with the history ofthe word... and the flawed science that gave rise to it... i cannot emphasise how this is just so crucial as the foundation,,, obviously it's your joutney... and your retina... but even if i have to adopt the techniques of clockwork orangr... you really must read it!!!!

id be happy to lend you my copy...

Thanks for the offer. I have ordered a copy - If it's crap I'll be chucking it through your window tied to a dead salmon.

I also ordered - 'Madness Explained: Psychosis and Human Nature' - I have been meaning to read that too.

 

[IntrospectionFtw!]

Okay cheers for the info, will look into that. The hallucinations aren't really bothering me that much as I know that they're not real, but if I do have schizophrenia will my opinion of that change..? Will I get worse over time if not treated..?

hallucinations are never a good thing, you are self aware which is a good sign
you say there not bothering you which is good usually psychosis is a distressing emotionally draining experience,i think you should definatly see a doctor and get proper advice but i would try coming off those meds to see if it makes a difference rather than just load up on antipsychotics which you may become dependent on and make you worse in the long run, not all psychotic experiences are a indication of schizophrenia.

as for schizophrenia prognosis/getting worse over time
i mean yh usually the hallucinations or psychotic symptoms start off mild
then get worse and worse leading into a full blown episode in my personal experience anyway, which is why the idea is to catch it early premodal? stage

as for long term prognosis if unfortunatly you do have a persistent psychotic condition like schizophrenia, you may or may not get worse over time it varies.

 

[Apotheosis]

but if I do have schizophrenia will my opinion of that change..?

What is it?

http://www.mentalhealthforum.net/forum/showthread.php?t=3220

 

[IntrospectionFtw!]

I like how im trying to help people and i feel like im about to have a bloody episode myself....

i dont think talking about mental health all day is gonna do me much good either lol...