• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

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GaryC123

GaryC123

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Joined
Mar 6, 2016
Messages
193
I don't get a lot out of life. I don't travel, never been married nor even had much in the way of dates. My work history is a disaster. I don't make much money on disability. I wish things would get better but they never do. In fact, I feel like I should count myself lucky. I may have very little of anything but at least I'm not completely destitute yet. I feel like life only gets worse and never gets better and that I have to be thankful for having next to nothing going for me.

Fuck this world. I want a refund.
 
steelboss

steelboss

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Feb 6, 2021
Messages
36
Location
Suzhou, China
Living is all about making something from little or even nothing. I was at rock bottom... below rock bottom for like 15 years. I had to find a way to save my life. I think you have a lot to offer and you just need to find your channel. Maybe art? Express urself?
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Feb 27, 2020
Messages
6,439
Location
Nashua NH
Hi @GaryC123 I also have a lousy work history, am on Disability and have Bipolar. You are fortunate to have at least a little whereas I have next to nothing. I live with my parents who are my main supports. I don’t know what to say except I feel your position. It sucks most of the time. Do you work in addition to the Disability or just the Disability? xo, j
 
GaryC123

GaryC123

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Mar 6, 2016
Messages
193
Hi @GaryC123 I also have a lousy work history, am on Disability and have Bipolar. You are fortunate to have at least a little whereas I have next to nothing. I live with my parents who are my main supports. I don’t know what to say except I feel your position. It sucks most of the time. Do you work in addition to the Disability or just the Disability? xo, j
I live with my parents too. If I didn't I'd be homeless.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Nashua NH
I live with my parents too. If I didn't I'd be homeless.
Same here. Actually I was briefly homeless before coming to stay here. It’s a constant fear of what will happen once my parents pass, becoming homeless again. He is 74 and she is 69 so it’s only a matter of time now. It’s crazy how much we have in common. Are you also in the US?
 
GaryC123

GaryC123

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Mar 6, 2016
Messages
193
Same here. Actually I was briefly homeless before coming to stay here. It’s a constant fear of what will happen once my parents pass, becoming homeless again. He is 74 and she is 69 so it’s only a matter of time now. It’s crazy how much we have in common. Are you also in the US?
Yes. I live in Florida. My parents are in their 80s. So it's just a matter of time for me as well.
 
L

Ladyfair

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Aug 12, 2020
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USA
Hi! I felt the same when I lived with my parents. I knew they would pass away someday but I guess I was too afraid to go on my own. When they did pass away I lived with my sister now I have my own apartment but I'm lonely and unhappy.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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6,439
Location
Nashua NH
Hi! I felt the same when I lived with my parents. I knew they would pass away someday but I guess I was too afraid to go on my own. When they did pass away I lived with my sister now I have my own apartment but I'm lonely and unhappy.
I’m so glad you have a place to stay at least.
I only have one brother and he keeps himself pretty far from the family so I don’t think that would be an option for me. xo, j
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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That
Yes. I live in Florida. My parents are in their 80s. So it's just a matter of time for me as well.
That’s very scary. Have you thought at all about what you might do once they have passed?
 
HLon99

HLon99

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Apr 15, 2020
Messages
650
Location
London, UK
Very daunting prospect to be facing. I was diagnosed with bipolar last year and all this time I kept worrying about whether I'll ever be able to get back up on my feet. My parents are in their 50s, so its not quite the same, but I can see that life is getting difficult for them by the day. My mum has chronic lung problems and my dad has high blood pressure. Money isn't good in the family and whilst they will do anything for me, I simply can't face the prospect of bleeding them dry. I know that I will have to start being more independant.

I'm feeling better now and taking some concrete steps to get my life back such as getting back into university. Is education something you may be able to consider, taking night classes or enrolling in a jobs training programme? Perhaps working from home on a flexible schedule. Even if its a basic job/zero hour contract its worth pursuing your independance. And don't ever think that it is too late to start. Life ain't easy for us, but its what you make of it. A friend of my mothers who also has bipolar, has a high powered career in the city and a family, so this illness isn't by any means a death sentence.
 
GaryC123

GaryC123

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Mar 6, 2016
Messages
193
That


That’s very scary. Have you thought at all about what you might do once they have passed?
Yes. I have thought about it and it depresses me so I try not to think about it too much. My hope is that when it comes to sink or swim and I'm thrown into the deep end I'll swim. But I kind of have my doubts. Maybe I could tread water but I don't know for how long.
 
GaryC123

GaryC123

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Mar 6, 2016
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193
It's too depressing to think about.
 
L

Ladyfair

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I’m so glad you have a place to stay at least.
I only have one brother and he keeps himself pretty far from the family so I don’t think that would be an option for me. xo, j
Hi Things usually work out, I am unhappy but I do have a roof over my head. Thank you for the nice response. (Hugs).
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Nashua NH
It's too depressing to think about.
I know what you mean. I find it very scary to think about personally. I am starting to look around for jobs and get my housing applications ready just to be proactive. It’s hard because I still don’t feel quite fit for work but the disability is so minimal I’d never survive on it alone. Are you working now or do you plan to work later? Housing is so expensive where I am. xo, j
 
Z

Zoe1

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Jul 8, 2019
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16,124
Location
Nowhere
I know what you mean, if I'm glued to the internet all day
I start to not enjoy life


:grouphug:
 
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