bipolor

[mad as a hatter]

hi folks i,m new 2 this had rapid cycling bipolor 7 yrs so they say find it hard 2 tk meds me pdoc pullin her hair with me but i don,t care feel top the world at times rite now it,s the paranoia i can,t stand feel i,m bein watched all the time feel there all after me goin lock me up in hospital been in a few times there all obssed with meds wanna give me antipsychotics soon told her i wasn,t taken then why they always got a look horror on there face when u say what do i need meds for nothing wrong with me there all liars even my family don,t get it they think i should be able 2 control me own mind and thoughts that be good i feel so high i wanna dance in the street that get neighbours talkin i,m rantin a bit ain,t i don,t c me pdoc for another 4 wks i don,t even get ne other support no cpn or nothin i ain,t important enough stuff the lot them it makes me angry tho just been left 2 get on with it got nobody 2 turn 2 when it gets bad ne way i,ve said enough for now

 

[Libra1]

Hi and to MHF you will find the forums helpful, supportive and friendly

 

[Dollit]

Welcome to the forum and hope we can give you some support here.

 

[mad as a hatter]

thanks guys for that lovely welcome i hope i can offer as much support 2 u as well didn,t sleep that well last nite feel like a total whirlwind this morning like i could run a marathon mind u not taken much meds rite now just chucked them away didn,t feel i need them ne way feel so invincible yet i don,t feel that ill ne more maybe i,m cured or something either that these doctors have been lying 2 me all this time that,s more like it i certainly feel like i,ve been put here for a reason got god in me head nfeel like the devil chasing me or something it feels wonderful yet it won,t last and i,ll end up with the worst depression and want 2 kill meself then the voices will start i feel encouraged by them 2 all this anot 2 tk them yet when i go se me pdoc i can,t tell her all this cause i feel she,s totally against me and trying control me and put me in hospital 2 her credit she won,t give up on me and sees me through the really rough times i can phone her ne time and she will always phone me and offer her help but when i,m like this i rebuff her help she always try presude me go on meds but i,m not convinced this time just keep thinkin what i need them for i,m not ill sorry it,s such a long post have 2 c what the day brings i feel agitated and it,s real early yet

 

[honeyquince]

Hi Mad as a Hatter and welcome to the forum. It's a great place here full of support and help. Have a browse around and get your bearings but do keep posting as well!

 

[Starbright]

Hi, mad as a hatter,

 

[Fedup]

Hello and to MHF

 

[mad as a hatter]

thanks for makin me feel so welcome i really apreciate that had a weird day as i said felt so high this morning could done ne thing even decided 2 give dog a bath on my own not normally that brave as she can be a handful i felt so invincible even the poor dog sensed somethin wasn,t rite she sat there perfect mind u had more water on me than her then come 5pm me mood changed and i had the worst depression again i wanted 2 harm meself made me feel so agitated but i,m feelim real high again 2 nite startin 2 feel real guilty about not taken much meds as it,s only just over a yr ago since i had my last episoide and ended up in hospital for 2 wks and i know me family find that hard when i,m unwell they keep saying 2 me it,s ur mind u control it not the voices tell them where 2 get off it does hurt when they say that cause as u now it ain,t that simple and it makes me feel so un supported they just don,t understand what it,s like i,ve got this woman in me head givin me hard time naggin or what drivin me nuts it,s about time i told this all 2 me pdoc when i c her nxt can,t go on like this ne more or i,ll end up in hospital again

 

[KP1]

If you don't wantto end upin hospital then take the meds.

 

[mad as a hatter]

i know ur rite but somethin inside me head tells me diff i don,t feel that ill at the mo i don,t think i need them tho me pdoc might say diff

 

[KP1]

Ok but it is a good idea to keep in touch with your psy doc so they know what you are doing and can help you when you need it.
Take care. KP