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Bipolar in social life

B

BlackBeauty

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May 24, 2020
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7
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Italy
Everytime I am depressed I hate to talk to people. Also I'm convinced that nobody likes me and of being judged. That's why I'm also afraid of people and have social anxiety.
When I'm "normal" I'm not afraid at all. I like to talk to people a lot and I'm very outgoing.
It's like being two completely different persons.
Do any of you have the same thing like me?
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Feb 27, 2020
Messages
8,260
Location
Nashua NH
Everytime I am depressed I hate to talk to people. Also I'm convinced that nobody likes me and of being judged. That's why I'm also afraid of people and have social anxiety.
When I'm "normal" I'm not afraid at all. I like to talk to people a lot and I'm very outgoing.
It's like being two completely different persons.
Do any of you have the same thing like me?
I have the same symptoms when I am depressed.
When I am manic I become more outgoing and sociable then back to being depressed again. This can leave people quite confused as at first Inwas very enthusiastic about being social with them and then just avoid them later. Admittedly it’s a strange thing...
 
K

karl7

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Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
926
Everytime I am depressed I hate to talk to people. Also I'm convinced that nobody likes me and of being judged. That's why I'm also afraid of people and have social anxiety.
When I'm "normal" I'm not afraid at all. I like to talk to people a lot and I'm very outgoing.
It's like being two completely different persons.
Do any of you have the same thing like me?
i used to have that experience of depression and then have difficulties relating to people (social anxiety)....i think its normal to have social anxiety when depressed
 
D

Dice

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Jan 20, 2019
Messages
88
Location
UK
Yes, I would imagine many here do. I don't feel comfortable in social situations sometimes; I'm fine in them at other times; and sometimes (yes, those times) I don't have any problems at all! (well, I don't think I do, but I do!) But yeah, if depressed, the whole world gets shut out and I don't speak to anyone if I can help it. If up and irritable, people tend to just piss me off really easily, like they're completely useless or too slow or inept etc. That's when in hindsight I feel like a vile person because I know this lack of patience and harshness is something I'm then judged by. But then that makes me withdraw from people a bit because I feel it's inevitable that this will surface again at some point, and so the cycle continues. I find it difficult to be sociable these days because of these things and because of the way my Bipolar developed, increasing in severity as time passed and so on. Oh the joys of being a nutter!
 
L

LoveandPeace

Member
Joined
Apr 16, 2020
Messages
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USA
Same here! Sometime crave social outings sometimes don't want to be seen. It might be a common thing among us your not alone.
 
Zana

Zana

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Apr 15, 2020
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150
Location
England
But yeah, if depressed, the whole world gets shut out and I don't speak to anyone if I can help it. If up and irritable, people tend to just piss me off really easily, like they're completely useless or too slow or inept etc. That's when in hindsight I feel like a vile person because I know this lack of patience and harshness is something I'm then judged by. But then that makes me withdraw from people a bit because I feel it's inevitable that this will surface again at some point, and so the cycle continues. I find it difficult to be sociable these days because of these things and because of the way my Bipolar developed, increasing in severity as time passed and so on. Oh the joys of being a nutter!
Well said. You pretty much summed up the deterioration of my social life and skills in one paragraph. Even us nutters can find something in common with others; there's always a silver lining!
 
D

Dice

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Jan 20, 2019
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UK
How long have you had it Zana?
 
Zana

Zana

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Haven't been diagnosed yet (psych agrees with me but doesn't want to rush to a diagnosis, which is fair enough). The signs have been there since I was 15 maybe but it's escalated dramatically in the past ~2 years. How about yourself?
 
D

Dice

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Jan 20, 2019
Messages
88
Location
UK
I was only just diagnosed in the last couple of years but I've had it for 20 years. It started off slow with a few years between episodes, then as I got older they became more frequent and the illness itself more developed. But other than the irritability - which is one of the newer aspects of it for me having only had that in the last 6 years or so, again becoming worse and worse and one aspect that I really wish I could get rid of - I'm much better now that I finally got onto a mood stabilizer.
To think that they were still throwing antidepressants at me up until just a few years ago seems hilarious now (it wasn't at the time of course!)
 
M

mugwort

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Joined
Mar 19, 2019
Messages
28
Location
Phila, PA US
I too get to the point where I just want to be by myself. With quarantine that's rather easy. I mostly communicate by phone but sometimes not even that. My diagnosis is complicated with being on the ASD char. I feel uncomfortable in crowds. In individual situations I find some people more approachable than others. Diagnosed over 20 years ago with BP by a psychiatrist.
 
UpnDwn1978

UpnDwn1978

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Jun 16, 2020
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5,888
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Norway
My friends tell me that I'm two different people that can switch between being a witty, outgoing guy to an introverted shy wallflower on a moment's notice. When I'm in a good state I feel almost like a normal person, although I'm generally anxious except when I'm drunk. When I'm low I have terrible self-esteem and suffer from paralyzing social anxiety. Through years of training I have learned to face my fears and seek out people and social experiences even though I know they will cause me terrible discomfort and distress. It's not ideal, but if I let the social anxiety control me I would have no life.
 
M

mugwort

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Joined
Mar 19, 2019
Messages
28
Location
Phila, PA US
Thank you for your reply. I feel for you and can relate. I too experience terrible self esteem when I'm feeling low. I am glad your years of training helped you face your fears . I like your attitude. I wish you well in continuing to seek people, social experiences.
 
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