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ABsea

ABsea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 25, 2011
Messages
1,362
Location
British Columbia, Canada
Sometimes I want to drop everything I worked so hard for and make up for the years I've missed. If I die, all the better. This world is a terrible place. All signs are telling me to do its. All my friends ended up so screwed because of drugs yet I somehow slipped through the cracks. Things seem to be moving backwards for me and I really really want it. I don't neeed it just I waNt it.
 
wendolene26

wendolene26

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 16, 2011
Messages
2,663
Location
Aberdeen
Hello ABsea

I've only just noticed your post, so I'm sorry for not replying before now. How are things with you now? Dying is not a solution and it is a final thing that cannot be changed. You are worth so much more than that. Your friends and family would be devasted if you were to take your own life.

What kind of support do you currently have? Are you in touch with your GP and/or a Mental Health Team.

Talk to me if you think it will help, we are a supportive forum and will try our best to listen and offer advice as best we can.

Take Care now,

Wendolene x
 
A

Apotheosis

Guest
Sometimes I want to drop everything I worked so hard for and make up for the years I've missed. If I die, all the better. This world is a terrible place.
I feel the same way.
 
gazza

gazza

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 30, 2010
Messages
198
Location
England
This just hit me a few minutes ago. I was jamming on my guitar and was quite lost in the moment. The urge was the strongest I have had in two years. I have been under some stress lately but not more than usual. This was an intense wave of craving. I just wanted it so bad and the thought of it had my tongue hanging out. It's passed now but oh boy, that was a powerful one. If it were infront of me I would have had to seriously leave the room or harm myself or brake something to have stopped myself. So glad it's gone now.
 
I

i_ve_always_been_a_storm

New member
Joined
Jul 26, 2011
Messages
4
Oh God, I just had a big urge myself. But I wrote this message instead and I already feel the urge dying down. I am so grateful that I didn't give in.
 
ABsea

ABsea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 25, 2011
Messages
1,362
Location
British Columbia, Canada
You guys are all so strong! I'm really proud of everyone with willpower, it takes so much energy just to not give in to the urge. I haven't had it as bad since that day but I'm back here because I can feel it coming again.. I'm scared, I want it all, just for a moment I want to be anywhere but here ! Shit I'm about to spend another restless night bawling my eyes out. It's only been like a month since my last 1 or 2? Week binge I don't even remember. Nights are the hardest cause I'm the last to go to bed, its when I'm alone with my thoughts and when the whole world seems to be sleeping but me. Good thing my friends are working late tonight or I know exactly how I'd be feeling in the morning...... Errr maybe I should find myself a therapist? Not sure about it yet since the long story behind it all. I'm working on accepting things for how they are and letting go of some control but I still. Hate. Everything.
 
C

Crazyjester

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 10, 2012
Messages
74
Maybe you should find yourself a therapist but only if you won't manage to get people close to you in real life (like me). They're more important than a shrink. I need to see a shrink but I don't want to see one. You would only get to talk everything about yourself but you can't know anything about the one treating you. Well, that's just the way I think. It sucks majorly. I'm also alone with my thoughts every day and they're killing me. Make me very restless and angry. Personally, it would seem to me that you could try a psychiatrist, see how it feels. I don't like it myself but I still go there because it helps me for a minute.
 
ABsea

ABsea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 25, 2011
Messages
1,362
Location
British Columbia, Canada
I just got in to see one this month in a few weeks. Every couple months or so i go on a crazy binge for weeks and then I'm fine again, feeling refreshed..
Meh, see how it goes, maybe I can get some good drugs out of it
 
C

Crazyjester

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 10, 2012
Messages
74
Haha, I'm afraid you won't get any good drugs except if they're anti-obesity drugs or something :D. If you start abusing them, you won't get more until you've waited the agreed treatment's full period. Going to therapy to find drugs is very low and I can tell you that it's pointless. They won't prescribe drugs very easily :p.
 
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