
kilroywashere21
Member
In 2018, I started to become open about my struggles with Bipolar I Disorder on my finsta that’s followed by my classmates in high school. My main goal was to come out and inform them about my struggles. I told them my symptoms (mania, depression, paranoia, aggression, excessive envy, making dumb decisions).
At first I thought that what I was doing was good. But within the next few days, weeks, and months there was pushback. Classmates started to shun me. People who used to wave to me in the hallways didn’t even look at me. Two people blocked me on both Instagram and Snapchat. And of course I lost a couple of followers. However, there have been people who’ve come out and supported me. And the two guys who I’ve been friends with since elementary school have stayed by my side.
Unfortunately I fit the bipolar stereotype. That we are all violent and pose a threat. I have a tendency to have really violent intrusive thoughts But these come and go within a few seconds. I also have a history of blacking out even though it only happened one time. One afternoon in therapy circle in 2016, a kid purposely splashed paint over my head. I picked up aN implement and that’s the last thing I remember. I hurt him so severely that he had to go get stitches and I had to stay overnight a psychiatric hospital. Like I said, it only happened one time. After the incident I got a major medicine increase.
I often think about what my social life and reputation would’ve been like if I had just kept my mouth shut instead of pouring my heart out and being honest.
But I can’t really blame people for notwanting to have anything to do with me. I’ve provided them with a wealth of reasons not to. I brought that on myself.
Currently I’m in my senior year of high school. Once I graduate, I won’t have see my shunners anymore.
At first I thought that what I was doing was good. But within the next few days, weeks, and months there was pushback. Classmates started to shun me. People who used to wave to me in the hallways didn’t even look at me. Two people blocked me on both Instagram and Snapchat. And of course I lost a couple of followers. However, there have been people who’ve come out and supported me. And the two guys who I’ve been friends with since elementary school have stayed by my side.
Unfortunately I fit the bipolar stereotype. That we are all violent and pose a threat. I have a tendency to have really violent intrusive thoughts But these come and go within a few seconds. I also have a history of blacking out even though it only happened one time. One afternoon in therapy circle in 2016, a kid purposely splashed paint over my head. I picked up aN implement and that’s the last thing I remember. I hurt him so severely that he had to go get stitches and I had to stay overnight a psychiatric hospital. Like I said, it only happened one time. After the incident I got a major medicine increase.
I often think about what my social life and reputation would’ve been like if I had just kept my mouth shut instead of pouring my heart out and being honest.
But I can’t really blame people for notwanting to have anything to do with me. I’ve provided them with a wealth of reasons not to. I brought that on myself.
Currently I’m in my senior year of high school. Once I graduate, I won’t have see my shunners anymore.
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