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Being told i have to go to church

J

JustARide

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 7, 2019
Messages
72
Location
York
I am not religious at all and have only attended a church service for christenings and funerals. Recently the woman who speaks to me and usually helps me/protects me started punishing me for betraying her. I didnt think I had but she says I gave too information to someone else and shes been awful since. Trying to make me kill myself, I am NOT suicidal and will not do these things, but i cant take her being against me. Today I went shopping and could smell burning and she told me my house was on fire and my dogs were going to die...then she laughed while I ran home in.absolute panic. Got home... everything fine!

She is saying if I want to redeem myself I have to go to church (a particular one) and that I "will find the answers there". I should have gone tonight but I resisted. I think I need to fight the demands she is making of me. But I'm scared and now thinking that If I'd gone today I might have had the answer (to a question I dont know). I'm scared of the whole religious connotation. I just want her to be nice to me again, but I know now that I cant trust her and that she wants me under her control.

I'm trying really hard. I'm so scared everything is going to plummet.

Please please understand that I will not give away our secrets. I wont say too much, just enough. I wont betray you. I need you. I want you. But not the way you've been.
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
6,095
Location
Nowhere
sorry to hear that
her behaviour is unacceptable
and you dont have to go to church

sounds like you live in a small town
and need support from places like here
or use phone lines if you can
whatever way you can to reach out

:grouphug: :goodluck:
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

Well-known member
Forum Safety Team
Joined
May 6, 2017
Messages
2,177
Location
Sheffiield
Today I went shopping and could smell burning and she told me my house was on fire and my dogs were going to die...
My voice pulled a very similar trick on me, gave me a hallucination of a burning smell and told me my house was going to catch fire and my cats would burn. A very cruel thing to do to someone, at least you won't fall for that again. At least he can't mess with my senses like that any more thanks to medication.

I think I need to fight the demands she is making of me.
That's what I did and still do over three years later, I don't give in to any demands or do what he tries to influence me to do unless I wanted to do it anyway, he goes through all the options like when I'm deciding what to eat so whatever I choose he's said it first, really quite pathetic.

but I know now that I cant trust her and that she wants me under her control.
Control is like a drug or alcohol to them, they get drunk on power or get addicted. Best to do your own thing and ignore them as much as possible, if they want in on your life then let it be on your terms only.

I would say they learn in time but mine hasn't, he's either very stubborn or very stupid in fact I believe mine has severe learning difficulties and may be retarded (a word I would never use to describe another human being).

This morning my voice was cursing me "f-you, f-you, f-you" then this afternoon was begging "please, please, please", he's not human in any sense of the word.
 
J

JustARide

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 7, 2019
Messages
72
Location
York
Thank you everyone. This is a pretty new experience for me and I'm a long way from figuring it all out... just trying to do the right thing every day and hope I dont make things even worse. I really appreciate your advice, thank you
 
Weirdnumber

Weirdnumber

Active member
Joined
Dec 10, 2019
Messages
36
Location
Italy
It happened to me as well: burning smell and additionally I could see smoke everywhere around me, like the whole town was on fire! I don't remember what the voices used to say in the mean time
 
J

JustARide

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 7, 2019
Messages
72
Location
York
Hello again! I feel to sleep after my post last night and was very sleepy when I messaged this morning so just wanted to say thanks again for your replies. Everything's so strange at the moment... I have days like yesterday where everything is crazy (for want of a better word!) and then days like today where I got up, went to work and am now home and as yet havnt heard a thing or had anything happen. The day isnt over yet though lol. I'm under a mental health team but dont know at what point I'm supposed to contact anyone... for example with what happened yesterday should i tell someone about that? Its not like they can do anything once it's over. 🤔 im so thankful for this forum and all of you.. if I wasnt able to reach out here everything could be a lot worse 😬. I hope you're all having a good day x
 
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