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Being 20 something with a dead end

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sparkycorry

New member
Joined
Jun 4, 2009
Messages
1
This my first thread so hoping to god some1 doesn,t write nasty reply. please don,t. im 22 years old. for past ten years wanted to end things but i know i couldnt do that to my family. wish i cud just die naturally and not put shame on my parents. the worst thing is just not being able to sleep. idont feel anything and just stare at the ceiling for an hour or sometimes just punch my head really hard to get whoosy and fall asleep. its not that i hate life its just that it doesn,t provide any rush or excitement like i see with other ppl. i really try to hav fun and stop being so moody but its hard when i geniunly cant talk to anyone. in a bar or after the cinema. always just feel uncomfortable and out of place wit friends. i also had high hopes careerwise but you know the way things are now. i always said id go through life even if its miserable cos i owe my mother that. but i,m just not going to accept being some forty year old waiter living alone. it would just be nice to hear from 20 y\o who feels the same
 
intelgal

intelgal

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Mar 17, 2008
Messages
1,413
Location
Yorkshire
Hi there :welcome: to the forum.. its a great place to be and lots of support can be offered.

I am a 20 something and myself in the past have wanted to end it but my parents feelings have always stopped me.

There is lots of help availble and you dont have to feel tis way. Have you tried your Gp. As for your career you are still very young and have plenty of time to get to a job that makes you happy.

Take care
and keep posting

Intelgal
 
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kt456

Active member
Joined
May 25, 2009
Messages
38
Hi Sparkycorry,

Welcome to the forum :)

It really sounds like you've had a terrible struggle. I'm 23 and I know how it feels to feel awful at what seems should be the best time of your life when you look at other people around you. I'm really glad you've found this forum. I've found everyone to be so helpful and it's very comforting to talk to people who understand.

Keep posting and I hope you find the help you need :)
 
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wvd1979

New member
Joined
Jun 6, 2009
Messages
3
You are not alone. I am 29 and I am at a crossroads in my life with no clue about where to go. If you ever need a friendly ear, feel free to PM me.

These feelings are not a defect, they are a product of society. We always focus on the party people and those with great lives, but not everyone fits the mold. I hope you can find your motivation. But please, don't hit yourself in the head. That will make you feel worse.
 
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Borderline

Guest
Being bored and unable to find enjoyment in life is a symptom of depression. I suffer with these feelings myself. I'm often afraid of the day, because nothing excites me or grabs my interest -- it just feels like I'm spanning time with no real point or purpose. I have also given myself black eyes trying to snap myself out of a depressed mood.

My only advice is to seek help. You're young and have a lot going for you. You're at a point in your life where you can do anything. Have your problems assessed by a professional and you may be able to get on with your life. Don't let time pass you by. Mental health becomes more difficult to manage if you let it build up.

That's all I got for you.
 
Jo1760

Jo1760

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 25, 2008
Messages
1,507
Location
London
Hi Sparkycorry,

Welcome to the forum - I hope you find some great support and advise on here - Feel free to vent all you need too, sometimes it can be a great help.

I'm 27 and i have to say in term of feeling down and parents thoughts stopping any actions - I can completely understand thoughts like that. I also often feel very alone even in friend groups - to be honest it happens a great deal to me, if there was some wonder answer i'd post it but the best advice I can say is go to visit your GP. I know its a massive and often daunting experience - i'm sure 95% of the members of here would say that also but its worth it to get the support you need. If you find it difficult to speak to them, it may be a good idea to print out what you have written on here, as its a good explainition of how you are feeling at the moment.

Quite often low mood, lack of sleep + the thought you are having are all linked so advice from a heath care profession should be able to help.

In terms of your career, you are still at the age where you could start something new. It might even be useful to look into working at a place where they can trian you at the same time towards whatever field you ultimately would like to work in.



Take care and let us know how you are doing.

Jo X
 
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Nutter_09

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 11, 2009
Messages
136
Location
Middlesex
Hiya, I am 23 and feel exactly the same when out with friends. I see them laughing and having a giggle and I feel out of place and like I can't have a laugh with them.
I hope you find something or someone that will help you cope better. Just remember you can speak on here whenever you need to.
 
Lara

Lara

Active member
Joined
Sep 9, 2008
Messages
39
Location
elmbridge, Surrey
This my first thread so hoping to god some1 doesn,t write nasty reply. please don,t. im 22 years old. for past ten years wanted to end things but i know i couldnt do that to my family. wish i cud just die naturally and not put shame on my parents. the worst thing is just not being able to sleep. idont feel anything and just stare at the ceiling for an hour or sometimes just punch my head really hard to get whoosy and fall asleep. its not that i hate life its just that it doesn,t provide any rush or excitement like i see with other ppl. i really try to hav fun and stop being so moody but its hard when i geniunly cant talk to anyone. in a bar or after the cinema. always just feel uncomfortable and out of place wit friends. i also had high hopes careerwise but you know the way things are now. i always said id go through life even if its miserable cos i owe my mother that. but i,m just not going to accept being some forty year old waiter living alone. it would just be nice to hear from 20 y\o who feels the same

I feel exactly the same. I'm 23 at the end of this month. Life is dispairing!
I want to be a secondary school art teacher - like you said high expectations - but I just cant afford it and do know ehre to get help from its like being in quick sand all the time. I have thought about ending my life but the thought of what a disgrace I would be always crosses my mind at the last minute, "How could I leave my mum to deal with my brother like this, how selfish am I being, what about every one else???" in the end its always every one else is more improtant than you are, people like us are call "people pleasers". I dont was to be the crazy old biddy that the kids make fun of. I want to feel and live life to the full, but how exactly do you do that when there is this huge black hole inside you, chewing at you keeping you an emotionally devoid drone?

I know ehat your feeling. I'm here if you wanna talk xxxxxx:grouphug:
 
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wilzy

Member
Joined
Jul 5, 2009
Messages
11
Dear sparkycorry - Your mother sounds like a really lovely person and someone that is really important in your life that you care about. You're lucky to have someone like that!

Welcome to the forum by the way. It's great that you've reached out to get some perspective on your thoughts.

It's quite normal to be worried about the future and from what you have said, you're particularly worried about being alone, be it no partner or no friends, or both.

Why is it do you think that you have trouble feeling comfortable around some people?
 
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GymShorts

New member
Joined
Jul 7, 2009
Messages
3
Please know that you're definitely not alone in the way you feel. I'm 34 now, but have battled feelings like you're having my whole life....and I just joined this forum today to seek advice and am making arrangements to get counseling for the first time ever for me. Hopefully by your seeking out help at an earlier age than me, you'll be in better shape than me to make positive changes.

If it hadn't been for thoughts of my family and general fear of death, there's no way I'd ever have made it out of my teens. When I was your age, I was especially lonely....I know how hard it is because everyone else your age, it seems like everyone else has friends and always has fun and hope.

I still haven't done well at making friends and I live alone, but the feeling that I was the only one at home alone on a Saturday night has subsided for me a bit, because it's part of growing older.

I wish I had good advice for you, because I'm just trying to learn to get a handle on things too.....keep strong, friend.
 
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